The Over-whelming Desire to be in One's Role


Non-heterosexual people were also targets of the Holocaust, since male homosexuality was deemed incompatible with Nazism. The Nazis believed that gay men were weak, effeminate and unable to fight for the German nation; homosexuals were unlikely to produce children and increase the German birthrate. According to the Nazis, "inferior races" produced more children than Aryans, so anything which diminished Germany's reproductive potential was considered a racial danger.[59] Homosexuality was also thought to be contagious by the Nazis.[60] By 1936, Heinrich Himmler was leading efforts to persecute gay men under existing and new anti-homosexual laws. More than one million gay Germans were targeted, of whom at least 100,000 were arrested and 50,000 were convicted and imprisoned.[61] An unknown number were institutionalized in state-run mental hospitals. Hundreds of European gay men living under Nazi occupation were chemically castrated by court order.[61] Although an estimated 5,000 to 15,000 gay men were imprisoned in concentration camps,[61][62] the number who died is uncertain. According to Austrian survivor Heinz Heger, gay men "suffered a higher mortality rate than other relatively small victim groups, such as Jehovah's Witnesses and political prisoners".[63] Gay men in Nazi concentration camps were identified by a pink triangle on their shirts, along with men convicted of sexually assaulting children and bestiality.[64] Lesbians were not usually treated as harshly as gay men; although they were labelled "asocial", they were rarely imprisoned on sexual-orientation charges. In the concentration camps, they usually wore a black triangle.[65] U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum's website, "Nazi Germany did not seek to kill all homosexuals. Nevertheless, the Nazi state, through active persecution, attempted to terrorise German homosexuals into sexual and social conformity, leaving thousands dead and shattering the lives of many more."[61]

Many homosexuals who were liberated from the concentration camps were persecuted in postwar Germany. Survivors were subject to prosecution under Paragraph 175 (which forbade "lewdness between men"), with time served in the concentration camps deducted from their sentences. This contrasted with the treatment of other Holocaust victims, who were compensated for the loss of family members and educational opportunities

Remember- This was all a vision of a extremely primitive human in social aspects(extreme immaturity)

see my Enlightenment page and Authoritarian - Dependent thinker - Immature thought        -verse- Libertarian - independent thinker - Mature thought ;

A vast majority of Adult Americans are more in the "Authoritarian" scope varying in degrees of, mainly due to fact we where not raised in a Society that nutured each other to Self-Actualize, 

No one is to blame, just part of Humanity evolving, Yet it's not so difficult if One simply tries


There are peoples male/female and male/male etc. whom by lack of maturity choose to have sex in places that they might be seen

And they should be "Shamed"

However where I pose , I select remote wildlife areas where I make all efforts nessary ,so I will not threaten anyone, be seen etc. by being mature about it, In nearly a life time of being nude in the Woods, only a few times have I ever encountered another person, and then, I could quickly cover myself as not to threaten them.

And mainly if I am copulating with a man or men  it has been on private property or very much known no one is around etc.


I have in my many years of walking in the woods on occasion spotted people copulating in Nature- in the woods-, I simply smile, blush and be on my way, gladly what they where doing seemed as though they where happy, it seemed non-threating to anyone in any way, it has always been a male and female, and doing it as I portray below, only the females breasts where flapping about verse my limp penis,,simply different yet as Natural as Nature intended for me.

Just desiring to be in my "Role" as a Lady,berdache,Fem-male,etc.

I don't wish to place such personal image on my site,nore any where for that matter, yet the point or objective here requires attention,requires one to truly look at what their "minds" are doing,re-acting etc. First imagine your walking in the woods,in a world such as ,say the early North American Exporers -woods-,

....Scenario 1 ; Say you had become friendly with a Native American tribe, and where nearing the area where they lived, as you walk along the ridge(about 50 yards behind me), you spot myself and another male,the other male thrusting he penis in and out of my bottom,you can clearly see we are "copulating",mating etc.Looking closer you indentify me,and my partner both "you know us",we noticed you,,we all are friends!,,A Natural act of Nature for these two friends,their special way simply."Blushing"...you turn and head on down the path toward their village.You as this explorer will always be at "peace", in your mind,and in their minds,they know you will cause them no harm in ways of say "making fun of them".

Scenrio 2- I really don't even wish to think of, as it is one of "Pre-Concieved Notions", as a explorer, your mind can't release from it, the beliefs,taught to you in the world you left behind, to come explore my world,this New World where here my tribe live in "Peace the best way we can". If as this explorer you make a Judgement, that- what we are doing is "wicked",bad etc..first you as this explorer have not and can not except "Nature",and it's many forms,you can not except this New World, even though what you viewed is "Clearly not harmful to you",,,you have become the "Wicked"!,,,due to the fact,your mind is simply "En-slaved to your "Old-World" of your Mind.

----------------------------------------------------Looking at Both Scenarios------------------------------------------------------------------------

In both Scenarios;

You as the explorer visit these peoples, often,have for a year, this is common of both scenarios.


Scenario 1;

       You love to be in the area,as these peoples friendship is very much welcome,they have taught you much in their ways of living with Nature,they themselves have grown to value you,always enjoy your visits, they have explained to you "Michael's way is as a berdache way", Michael's role is with the women and children, he is highly trusted with them,helps care for them in all ways,he fishs,builds our shelters,cleans game,makes crafts,tools etc.However Michael sexual has accepted the role as female, which is very important to our Way , as the young men of sexual age, know,with Michael's constent and guidance can learn ways of "copulation",ethic's of, how to perform in non-vulgar ways safely, The young females are kept safe from "pregnancy", as well as jealously,competiveness's, until all have evolved to a mature enough level. The young men he teachs them of hunting,building etc.

     The explorer 1 accepts their ways with ("Grace",TO ACCEPT THE VOID- Gravity and Grace/ Simone Weil) due to have open mind-  We engage the world by forms of the implicit love of God. Beauty, friendship, religious ceremonies – all these can lead Mankind to God- Simone Weil

Scenario 2;

     This explorer judges,only comes to see the Peoples wanting, the tribe knows this,however due to fact they are very peaceful. they in essence "put up with him,until he leaves,they dread often that he might bring them harm some day, they know his view of Michael are poor,and yet know once in woods alone with Michael , he tried to get Michael to submit to him,  Michael had to fight him off!

-----------------------------See explorer 1 accepts---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Through inquiry with the elders;

      They have explained the "ways of the berdache",in it full extent,the Symbolic elements,such as Michael by submitting to be as berdache, and being in the female role is a extreme psychological trama for a man,for a male to survive losing his male ego,masculinity is a great spiritual event, -to survive it- Thus our Peoples hold this in great respect.All our people know,Michael is no harm to the women and children,only helps them. The young men know he is availble for them ,if they compile to his rules,ethics etc. as there are no female availble until they mature to proper level.

                                                               by paying Attention; Explorer 1; created a Void in his self/being, by way of dispersing/shelving his old way of thinking, Thus  creating a new Void, for this New Way to enter into his self/being. 

                                                                                                                               -He over came a Pre-conceived Notion-

----------------Believe me, I am quite of Aware of submitting,allowing a Man to ejaculate in my self/being---yet it is Symbolic----------------

After being celibate for so long, yesterday I think was first time I have wished not be "celibate any longer"

And realized the psychological toll it is taking on myself.

In my Life time,I hope to go to store dressed as this and not feel afraid

To understand better why I did like my "groups,gang-bang setting", and the content/context of;

        I  don't think I ever thought it "shame full ",it felt very much ok,so I sought the attention of it, I could get more attention.

        I had been suppressing my "need to be in my role", my entire life, so when it first happened, I quickly seen it was away to 

           fulfill, a very empty void.

        Yet very early on,I could see none of these guys, wanted me as "just their" partner,most had wives/girl-friends.

        Yet I knew I wanted a straight heterosexual male to have me like,a male would have a female partner

         So was kinda like "When in Rome,be as the Romans", I accept what I could get,when I could,in hopes I would fine the right

           guy, and the more I could see improved the odds,chance of, Yet now or not then, is not the right time for many straight males              to take a Berdache type like myself as a partner.

         So one might see the importance better of "when the Berdache type people" can go to the store,go in public safe,without                    being shamed, more men of the type I think most berdache desire, might ask us out on a date, just like the type male, that                  likes straight heterosexual females, no different, only that our bodies are male, yet we/I desire to be in the role of the ;

                                                  "straight heterosexual females" sexually

I am only using Two-spirit as model/similarity;

"The two-spirit (formerly called berdache) was a sort of Native American transgender person who wore the clothing of the "opposite" sex.

I want to bring up points that the above "gifs", represents to myself;

                                          First this could be looked at in the way of the Scenario above (the two Explorers). In that from the trail in the woods next to these railroad tracks,(far from known public) You spot my friend and I . I am clearly getting in position for him to "Bred me" (which he does). As Explorer 1 does, you accept it as "this is their natural way," verse take position of Explorer 2, and judge, then begin projecting your own preconceptions, causing hate,harm etc.

                                          Second , though this many years ago, I wonder if this has changed;  " It was difficult to get a black boyfriend to even go hiking in the Woods, I would ask them some times "Why don't you like going to the Woods ?".  the reply was always " Black people don't go into woods Alone, so it isn't something we do, we fear the White man, Alone in the Woods"

                                         Ask yourself next time ,while out fishing on a Lake, or hiking in a forest,

                                                             why not many black people are here, enjoying Nature

                  "Part of that memory is the unfortunate fact that coming together in public spaces wasn’t always safe for Black folks. That legacy of not having safety in numbers still lingers today, and has led to a particular way of thinking about nature for Black folks. When the Outdoor Foundation surveyed Americans and asked why they don’t take advantage of the outdoors, more than a third of Black Americans said, ‘they’re just not interested.’- excerpt from "Black folks and nature / KALW public radio"