First Impressions, first of experience,the first Sight of,

I have always wondered why I am so attracted to black men, a certain type ,personality,manner etc.As well as the relationship with   "Pre-Concieved Notions"

 Being my first real sexual experince with another human being,  being femininized and set in feminine role at age 13 , then liking it,feeling it to be right,it fit me etc.

Finding a Mate (I wrote this on flowers in hair page)

I think it shouldn't take the average person very long,and if they engage their "empathy " mind, to see that being transgender has some unique difficulties in finding a person to mate with, appearance, mannerism, at least prior to speaking , start the way most likely, at least at the store, out in public.

      I'd say I met a lot of my men through blind-dating type function, word of mouth.

       for myself ,what at time is frustrating is , I'll be some where, store,etc. see a black guy I find attractive, which sets my mind in               motion " how can I get his attention ", " what can I say if I just go up and strike up a conversation ", "How can I present myself           as "Feminine".

        If do get a chance, to talk with him, how can I as quickly as possible convey my interest in him, convey that I am....;                                                                                                         " female roled sexually"

We’ve all heard about the importance of first impressions and how hard it is to change them later. In fact, research tells us it only takes the duration of an eye blink to size up another person in terms of attractiveness and trustworthiness. Over the next three seconds, we form a more “complete” conclusion about a new acquaintance relating to their presumed personality and competence.

The majority of communication happens on a nonverbal level. That means that sensory factors such as how we look, sound and smell drive much of the impressions conveyed when we meet someone new. Body language is many times more relevant than the words we utter.

The Power of a First Impression

New research suggests that first impressions are so powerful that they are more important than fact.

A new study found that even when told whether a person was gay or straight, people identified a person’s sexual orientation based on how they looked — even if it contradicted the facts presented to them.

“We judge books by their covers, and we can’t help but do it,” said Nicholas Rule, Ph.D., of the University of Toronto. “With effort, we can overcome this to some extent, but we are continually tasked with needing to correct ourselves.”

“Furthermore, the less time we have to make our judgments, the more likely we are to go with our gut, even over fact,” he added.

“As soon as one sees another person, an impression is formed,” Rule said. “This happens so quickly — just a small fraction of a second — that what we see can sometimes dominate what we know.”

A series of recent studies, presented at the Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP) annual conference in Austin, Texas, shows that appearance affects everything from whether we end up liking someone to our assessment of their sexual orientation or trustworthiness.


Identification is a psychological process whereby the individual assimilates an aspect, property, or attribute of the other and is transformed wholly or partially by the model that other provides. It is by means of a series of identifications that the personality is constituted and specified. The roots of the concept can be found in Freud's writings. The three most prominent concepts of identification as described by Freud are: primary identification, narcissistic (secondary) identification and partial (secondary) identification.[1]

While "in the psychoanalytic literature there is agreement that the core meaning of identification is simple – to be like or to become like another", it has also been adjudged '"the most perplexing clinical/theoretical area" in psychoanalysis'.


The Evolved Nest (Evolved Developmental Niche; EDN)


Every animal has a nest for its young that matches up with the maturational schedule of the offspring (Gottlieb, 1997). Humans too! The Evolved Nest (or Evolved Developmental Niche; EDN) refers to the nest for young children that humans inherit from their ancestors. It's one of our adaptations, meaning that it helped our ancestors survive. Most characteristics of the evolved nest emerged with social mammals more than 30 million years ago. Humans are distinctive in that babies are born highly immature (only 25% of adult-sized brain at full-term birth) and should be in the womb another 18 months to even resemble newborns of other species! As a result, the brain/body of a child is highly influenced by early life experience. Multiple epigenetic effects occur in the first months and years based on the timing and type of early experience. Humanity's evolved nest was first identified by Melvin Konner (2005) as the "hunter-gatherer childhood model" and includes breastfeeding 2-5 years, nearly constant touch, responsiveness to baby's needs, multiple responsive adult caregivers, free play with multiple-aged playmates, positive social support for mom and baby. Calling these components the Evolved Developmental Niche, Narvaez and colleagues add to the list soothing perinatal experience (before, during, after birth) and a positive, welcoming social climate. All these are characteristic of the type of environment in which the human genus lived for 99% of its existence. Below are publications and a powerpoint about the evolved nest.

Why does the evolved nest matter? Early years are when virtually all neurobiological systems are completing their development. They form the foundation for the rest of life, including getting along with others (sociality and morality.