Believe me, I very much wish I could appear as the image on right portrays

Non-Op Non-Hormone MtF / my term for myself "Fem-male"

(shemale,ladyboy,femboy,transgender women,transfeminine male/female-roled-male, all work)

"I think for myself accepting the fact that " I'm am in the body I am in is very much, a need " ,for as much as I have desired to have a female like body " surgery for a vaginoplasty / vulvoplasty may not be a reality I will ever know" it's real late in the game!

For My self the " Vaginoplasty " surgery has always been by far my main and what I'd say " essential " surgery.

  Where at times I have been pre-occupied thinking of it,fustrated about not being able to have such a procedure done, for what            ever reasons,technology, ,(evolution of the procedure), imformation, fact that so few are done in United States, 

           I know I have never really -desired- to be male, or use my penis as a male, I have never penetrated another male with it,                      or  have I even had sex with a female since 1998, and prior to that it was very difficult to get a erection, due to psychological                conflict, I used it, yet didn't seem right, I say by 1994, I was wanting a Female to use a dildo and bone me, and I perform oral              sex on her

            By 1984 , I knew in my heart, I'd made a mistake taking the male role,marrying,having a child..  ( I knew I was female roled)

              What a Dilemma!. and this is the big,big problem I have with Social Construct, How damaging these religions can be.

            Lack of education about human sexuality ! ,,if one thing the Internet has done, is allow the individual to explore the topic of                   human sexuality. Yet not until 1996 would that be available to myself. 

            By 1997 , I began finding imformation on the " Third -Gender" types..the term berdache when came across it " Fit me "                           (The word originally came from the Persian bardaj barah , and via the Arabs bardaj spread to the Italian language as                            bardasso berdasia , and to the Spanish as bardaxa or bardaje bardaja by the beginning of the sixteenth century. About the                   same time the word appeared in French as bardache... and refers to the passive homosexual partner(FN19) (alternative                    spellings from Jacobs(FN20) and elsewhere have been inserted in brackets). 

                                                                     The fact the berdache " took the Female role "

             Thus finally, after starting to pose for life drawing classes, which in directly gave me confidence to be accepting of my role.                  then .  Then out of the blue to have a male whom , nicely yet directly asked me if I'd like to suck his cock, soon I was, then                  soon he was boning me, then soon he was introducing me to friends, on and on, within a year it was rare not to give a guy                  at least a blow-job every day of the at least 30 or so I would routinely see in my " Female role "

             I do have much empathy for those whom do get Hormone/surgery....as it is a over-whelming desire,,and I've sat on that                        fence wondering if to Do it or Not do it,..knowing life is short....What a Dilemma!

        "dilemma and cognitive dissonance and gender dysphoria all wrapped up in One ! "

I called these my " Slut-boy" pants, I could wear these at night , met a guy some where, and he could easily, get on my knees,bent over hood of car etc. and give me a quick boning til ejaculating in me. I made up variations of these pants (lots). as in summer, weather good, I wasn't worn out from work, I make my best effort to get " Boned " nightly. some times could. Thus the more guys I had in my " Tribe ", the more that improved.

               The Reason I write about this here is the " Confirming " aspect of myself having a vagina instead of a penis

                   I had plenty of chances to ask the men whom routinely " boned me ".."would you like me better if I had a vagina ?"

                  Upon asking , most would say something to effect of " maybe at first, to confirm that I was truly "female at heart ", yet                           they really liked the tightness/feeling of my bottom, the fact that they could ejaculate in me and not worry of getting me                         pregnant. Once they got to know me though, the Confirming part was needed, because they knew now I really did                           wish to simply be Bred as though I where Female. (which is true, some guys would say I was like; 

                                                                              a bitch in heat, which is true too!

                 ♥  If I told them I really wished I had a vagina instead of a penis, " would it matter to them ? "...Almost all would reply , no                          that they'd still would only want to " Bone " me in my bottom. They knew I was male, yet Fem-male/female roled,,there                          seem to be no "homosexual" stigma in their minds , that I seemed more like a "Sex surrogate" They all knew ,                                because " I'd often have to beg/plead from them to ejaculate in my bottom, because I needed their semen in                        me "...They all knew my main objective was getting their semen in me (selfish like), I loved pleasuring them,                        yet I often may say to them " I need that cock of your's hard, up in my tight Fem-boy pussy ejaculating "

                                     My men all knew I was getting "Boned" by many men, that I was taking their ejaculations up in me, Yet knew                         that I would only have sex with Straight top men, that met the right profile I liked (I was very selective) They knew, if                             they, had a friend (" my type ") whom might like to bone me,;

                                                                                                  - they could have them call me- (which happened sometimes)

                      Thus if they wanted to keep routinely "boning" me safely, everybody had to be safe

                         I personally was getting tested monthly, if I wasn't sure about a man, I'd tell him he have to get tested before I'd                                    swallow his cum, or even take his penis up in my bottom, if I reach point where I allowed a man to penetrate my                                   bottom, he was not wearing a condom ever, and he was going to cum in me. 

                            (I've never had a man in me with a condom, except at the " Last Man Standing parties" described on Indigo page )

                     For myself , I could careless if I have a orgasm/ejaculate when I am with a man, and seldom have, unless we have                              a lot time so as he can bone me slowly, easily, and even then if I ejaculate I am limp with no erection - pleasure is                                the Act it's self, it feel good having his penis in me sure, yet my real pleasure is getting him ;

                               To bred me like a female - I have no desire to climax my self -none

note from article later 

McGinn, a transgender woman and mother of twins, says the “human drive to be a mother for a woman is a very serious thing. -Transgender women- are no different.” 

                                                                                " and I'm a Transgender women(fem-male) "  -me


                                        My type- No STD's

Q: What are the chances of a man being infected with HIV after condomless sex with a woman?  -U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs

In general, the risk of a man getting HIV from an HIV-positive woman during vaginal intercourse in the United States is low--probably less than 1 of 1,000 exposures will result in actual infection. This risk may be higher depending on certain factors, such as whether the woman is having her period or whether the man is uncircumcised, and it also may be higher in poor countries. It is very low if the woman is taking effective anti-HIV medications and/or if you are taking PrEP (a daily pill to prevent HIV).

Of course, there is no risk of getting HIV from a woman unless she has HIV, so it's good to talk about this with any potential sex partner. After all, she may have the same thoughts or concerns about whether YOU have HIV, but also might not bring up the subject. And since it's often hard to be sure, especially if you don't know someone very well, remember that using a condom can greatly reduce the risk of spreading or getting HIV and other diseases, can prevent unintended pregnancy and can be a good way to show that you care about your partner.

An even better way might be to get to know your partner really well before having sex, which makes it easier to talk about HIV and pretty much everything else.


If one researchs the " Third-gender " types, one will find that , by far like my self we desire non-homosexual males and do not desire gay males- universally,over all cultures..... thus for my self this seems to be by " Natures Design " 

                    For myself wanting a vagina, not a penis,  I simply am not male sexually, in a psychological sense, have no desire to                           be,never really have, and want to been seen as such, and I don't want anyone to desire me cause I have a penis,                                 a - good- example might be the nude beach scenario,,if I don't have a penis, means I use a penis, and if I had that                               changed,  means; I don't wish too !

                    I think like myself , there is that Desire to be Bred, similar to real females, thus our pleasure comes from pleasuring the                        men , so then they can get us pregnant, I know many times why I am getting boned and he is ejaculating in me, in the                          heat of the moment I will pleadlng like say " I wish I could have your baby "..freaky I know,yet how it feels.

  excerpt from article below      "

“I’d bet just about every transgender person who is female will want to do it, if it were covered by insurance,” says Dr. Christine McGinn, a New Hope, Pa., plastic surgeon who performs transgender surgeries on men and women and is a consultant to the new movie The Danish Girl, about one of the first recipients of sex reassignment surgery.

McGinn, a transgender woman and mother of twins, says the “human drive to be a mother for a woman is a very serious thing. Transgender women are no different.”

I think it important to know

There is a Huge difference of being Gay and being Transgender the above is one

     and it doesn't seem to be the case that Gay men wish to be like a Female in any way possible, from dressing as,            being bred as, having a child as etc. And having a orgasm is very low on the desire list, compared to being " Bred"

              " inseminated with semen " even though, it most likely it will not work- the Desire is there and by; 

                                                                          " force of Nature"

I think this "look" reflects how I feel psychologically

                                                                                "I am very much a Girl inside"

I very much want to look like this

 I very much understand; The idea of looking as Female as possible,enables a Transgender type male, to blend into society, to say walk down the street, go out in public, and be in a form of that which One desires to be, yet by having surgery, one still has the True self inside and still lives in                       society, that as a Whole remains un-evolved 

               I guess I have asked myself this question; If I lived in a society where a Androgynous person is simply accepted, where it is their spiritual belief, would we have any need to try to hide ?                  To hide, to me is like covering up a problem,sweeping it under the rug, thus never dealing                with it,  And!, this is a illness of Society, not a illness of the Androgyny/transgender person.

                            ----------No different then Slavery was and still is a illness of Society-----------

               The world today doesn't make sense, so why should I paint pictures that do? 

                                                                                                        ~Pablo Picasso


I think as Society accepts the Fact that there are many people whom don't "Indentify" with their biological gender,-Like myself wishing to be a male's "Girl-Friend",wishing to be around other girls as a girl,doing girl things.

          Then not a lot maybe,yet more Straight Males will accept "Fem-males" as simply males whom wish they could be women,and treat us as "Women",want to be with us sexually as if we are "Women",without need to have surgery- 6/19/2018


Looking back at my youth, there was many times where "Signs" of my " gender conflict " surfaced, such as one time when in 4 or 5 grade, while playing at school my pants got ripped, revealing to other students "I was wearing a pair of my mom's panty hose".

Many situations like this occurred through-out my youth - causes for embarrassment-

I do know in "Our Society" -if you have a boys body, you are expected to have a boys mind-"     What a challenge if your Body,doesn't mirror,Reflect your Mind !   - what do you do?

This may sound silly,yet the prayer " God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I can not change,the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to Know the difference-please "

Thus , I feel now I can change the Way I see myself- I can't make Society change the way they see Me-

           I can't make Society accept Me,as I accept Me, this would be silly,unrealistic

           I can educated or reveal whom I am in my mind, to others,which I am trying only to do here,in hope it may help others.

If one does a inquiry into " Non-Op- transqender"", One can soon see why "Gender Dysphoria",can be so difficult to wrap our minds around to understand,why the person with " psychological gender conflict" can be stuck .

If I could wave a magic wand-be reborn,I would wish to be a "Female",yet not through artificial means!

I put together some excerpts from articles.forum responds etc. from the internet ,-about NON-OP TRANSSEXUAL ,Non-OP Male to female.:

      ♠  "When you get right down to it, gender identity is innate, and transsexual people transition so they can feel right in their own skin, but the expression of gender identity, and the subsequent responses to that expression are entirely based on living in a world with other women and men, and it is this feedback from those other people which triggers our brains reward system and makes us feel good being who we are. If you lived alone in a cabin in the wilderness with no human contact, you could know you were suffering from transsexualism, but transitioning wouldn't change your day-to-day existence much. The animals and trees wouldn't treat you any different, and it's debatable as to whether you'd feel any better."-unknown

          ♠     (mtf)

1. Is it someone born male who is fully a girl in her head but don't want to operate just cos of circumstancial factors as family, reputation, work etc... so she lives her daily life like a man but is a girl in her head confirmedly?

2. Is it someone born male, wants to become and live like a woman but cannot operate due to medical factors as age, illness?

3. Is it someone born male and transitions upto a certain limits, like does all FFS, boob implants but REFUSES to complete SRS INTENTIONALLY cos she is happy keeping her male genitals and in slang is what they call Shemale/Ladyboy(no offense to anyone)

4. Is it someone born male who CANNOT transition whatsever cos she just lacks money to throughout her entire life?

Someone please CLARIFY, still I don't get this term, neither do I understand what is ANDROGYNE. For me is someone who appears dual. Please explain both, thanks.- unknown




           Did I choose to,for example when looking at a beautiful females in a fashion magazine or playboy, instead of maybe being sexual attracted to them - like maybe a normal male might be-, I fancy looking like them

           What if ,seeing a male and female having sex,in a adult movie, instead of wanting to be the male, I fancy being the Female


           Did I decide to want differently ?

Believe me, I fancy being a "attractive female" for Him,as he walks down the hill!,- yet I can be a "Fem-male for Him",

and if he is able, He can treat me,just like a "Lady"- that is completely up to his "Mind",yet I can offer myself to him, to treat me as though , I am a "Lady" and make Love to me.

I feel fortunate that I have never wanted to change my body, yet I have great empathy for those whom do.

Some people have a gender which is neither male nor female and may identify as both male and female at one time, as different genders at different times, as no gender at all, or dispute the very idea of only two genders. The umbrella terms for such genders are ‘genderqueer’ or ‘non-binary’ genders. Such gender identities outside of the binary of female and male are increasingly being recognized in legal, medical and psychological systems and diagnostic classifications in line with the emerging presence and advocacy of these groups of people. Population-based studies show a small percentage – but a sizable proportion in terms of raw numbers – of people who identify as non-binary. While such genders have been extant historically and globally, they remain marginalized, and as such – while not being disorders or pathological in themselves – people with such genders remain at risk of victimization and of minority or marginalization stress as a result of discrimination- Christina Richards / Non-binary or genderqueer genders

Maybe due to the fact that I have always related to being "Fem" in the way "Two-Spirit people" have (early American natives didn't get SRS surgery,etc.)..Simply "inspiring" to be like women,or more like a female in mannerism,dress and sexual role,I have been escaped the great need to attempt to "Trans-form to female"

Sexually,I feel in my life, I have in certain ways been more selective then most people,and consider myself extremely selective,for example it is extremely rare for me to see,meet a male that I have any sexual interest in,and I have no sexual interest in females.Above I show a very attractive black nude male,visually,I am very attracted to him,however if upon meeting him,if his personality is not to my liking,I would not engage with him sexually,however if I like his personality,this is where I become "vulnerable",due to the fact,I will very much want to present/project myself to him,that I am a "Fem-male",if we talk a bit,,hit it off, I might ask him directly something like "have you ever been with a Fem-male sexually?",if he shows interest,desire and the environment,time is right,,I most likely would ask if I could perform "fellatio" on him,,if that occurred,,and we both where comfortable with out-come,I would most likely ask him to "Bare-back me" and ejactulate in my "bottom".so I am very vulnerable at this point,and my "history" tells me I have been like this.So I am fortunate to have selected the right men,as I have never had any type of sexually transmitted illness(STD's)

I think for Us as "Fem-male types" to realize to importance to see that "homo-sexual men are attracted to Men whom are Men".

We as "Fem-males" thus are not compatible with "Homo-sexual men", thus I have made it clear to all men I may have encountered sexually, " I am a biological male,yet want to be a female,so try to imagine me,treat me simply as female"- "bone me, as if I was so! "

I think the "Idea that a Fem-male is only attracted to Straight males sexually", might hardest thing for Society to wrap their minds around- for a Homo-sexual male to be attracted to myself is very "Naïve" on their part,and shows they are "seeing me simply as a Body"and not seeing me as a Whole...for example ,I am and always have be attracted to Jodi Foster,yet not sexually.

    ♠  I no way want, a Male or Female to want to perform "fellatio" on me, if either sex do, they are not seeing me as a "Fem-male"-             my penis must be seen as-" insignificant"

    ♠  I only want a man, whom can see me in my role as a "Woman" thus a male whom is attracted to my body/my penis is not seeing        me as a whole human being,thus is un-empathtic,thus Naïve ,thus I have not desire in them,thus they are not seeing                           "Reality",thus in a certain sense- wasting much time-                                 

      One must understand and study the Berdache and Mahu (third gender types),and realize it would be a "Homo-sexual" act to                have sex with another of the same sex ,whom is act to us sexually as a male..a Berdache isn't attracted to another  →                      - Berdache-  this is tough to realize,yet to understand " A male has to imagine for himself as a female,for a moment"

    ♠  Another example, - I in all reality ,I am posing nude with another female, because I feel female,I am not sexually attracted to               her ,   for it  would be -Gay- for me to be attracted to Her,if however she was transgenderFemale to male,then I could be with           her in my  female role,if she could accept me as a "Fem-male"

For myself : " having a man "humping,thrusting his cock in and out of my bottom,,then hearing him moaning,calling out "Im going to cum!",watching him jerk about as he ejactulates up in my bottom,,is the most pleasure I have ever had sexually - he has bred me,I feel so much like a "Lady" at this moment.

Excerpt from above link

(Transitioning Individual transgender lives track a wider cultural history of surgery, hormones and revolutionised gender identities )

On 1 December 1952, New York’s Daily News broke the story of Christine Jorgensen, formerly George Jorgensen, an introverted 26-year-old soldier from New York City who transitioned with the help of surgery and hormones. ‘Ex-GI Becomes Blonde Beauty,’
       A front-page story in the Chicago Daily Tribune said Jorgensen’s parents received a letter from their son ‘telling them how surgery and injections changed him into a normal woman’. Another article in the Austin Statesman included a telephone interview with Jorgensen. The reporter asked her if her hobbies were male or female. ‘I mean are you interested in say, needlework rather than a ball game?’ Jorgensen responded: ‘If it’s a normal female interest, then it interests me.’


I guess by dressing up at times as Feminine,helps avoid need for any actual "transformation" in "perm" way

I often think about Breast Augmentation as a reality

I do often think of "Orchiectomy" sometimes

       Orchiectomy is the removal of one or both testicles (testes) and is generally performed by a urologist. The testicles are the male sex organs that produce sperm and the male hormone, testosterone.

   Mainly for myself would be to reduce sexual desire; 

Bilateral orchiectomy carries the possibility of side effects. They are related to the loss of testosterone following the removal of both testes. These include:

  • Infertility
  • Loss of sexual interest -this would be nice for me
  • Erection problems -this wouldn't bother me,if I never could have a erection
  • Hot flashes
  • Breast enlargement (gynecomastia)- this would be nice for me
  • Weight gain
  • Loss of muscle mass
  • Osteoporosis


As I have been researching "Orchiectomy" ,(castration) surprising myself, that I would consider this!, However I like many of the effects it offers.


I am not going to say that male to female transition is wrong, as I have not walked in the shoes of those whom have decided to go through the surgery,hormone treatments etc, I only am trying to look at the big picture of the whole Idea of "transgender". I know how difficult it seems,I am just glad of ; being just content with not having the desire to do anything other then in private wearing a skirt,a dress,a bra etc.,and doing my "androgyny nudes" posing. Yet there are pro's and con's, and some of the con's must be known.

  Yet I also know, any one biased by religion, is just that, yet I can hear what they say, I know the bias is there,, very much the reason of "separation of Church and State" and there is a very fine line they walk not to ;

What is the difference between discrimination and Prejudice?
There is a difference between prejudice and discrimination. Prejudice is an attitude that a person has about a group of people or an individual. This attitude usually is not a positive attitude. Discrimination is an action that a person or a group takes toward another person or group because of the negative beliefs that exist....the Church and State issue, at this time in history,is tender at best.

 I greatly admire many teachings of many religions, yet I greatly do not agree with much of their followers conduct.

I very much have fantasized about being pregnant and being able to breast feed.yet know this very much is a fantasy.

 so I can relate to the idea that another has the desire to fully transition from male to female.

excerpt from sexchangeregret.com; 

Up to 20% Have Regret; Sex Changes Are Not Effective, say Researchers

The review of more than 100 international medical studies of "post-operative" transsexuals finds up to 20% regret transitioning and no conclusive evidence was found that shows gender reassignment surgery improves the lives of transsexuals, with many people remaining severely distressed and even suicidal after the operation, wrote David Batty in the UK Guardian.

After reading much at sexchangeregret.com; I am pretty content being just "Androgynous",wearing my padded bra,my dresses and being in a Female role, and realizing being feminine isn't about one's body..-me

In my response to the above article"Responding to the Transgender Revolution" for example this author ,right away involves state issues,as though assuming all are Christian, thus stepping across the Line of separation of Church and State, the church is not allowed to publicly influence public policy regarding state issues, this is very serious as The United States is a country based on that freedom, the church is there for their believers in their church. Many,Many in America are not Christian. And right now the church seems to lacking in seeing problems under their own roof.

Getting Comfirmation surgery (Vaginoplasty/vulvoplasty) is not that common, very few U.S doctors are performing it, the following is best I have been able to find on the numbers of ; 

     This is hard to estimate because of the levels of stealth and secrecy in the community. This is the best I can find to help estimate.

Some facts from.. Estimating the Prevalence of Transsexualism as of 2001

  • Harry Benjamin, M.D. one of  the pioneers of SRS claimed to have personally done over 2500 MtF SRS operations upto mid 1973.
  • About 800-1000 MtF SRS operations are performed each year as of 2001.
  • Stanley Biber has himself done over 4,500 SRS operations since he began doing the surgeries in 1969; for many years Dr. Biber did two SRS's per day, three days per week!
  • The top three U. S. Surgeons (Eugene Schrang, Toby Meltzer and Stanley Biber) together performed a total of 400 or so SRS operations each year as of 2001.
  • Lynn Conway estimated there are 32,000 post-op MtF women in America as of 2001.

The site U R not Alone has 17,209 members in the United States.
  • 5,431 identify as girl or M2F
  • 927 identify as MtF Pre-op
  • 125 identify as MtF Post-op
  • 1,666 identify as MtF Non-op
  • MtF numbers on this site are very low...

So with a conservative guesstimate of a thousand surgeries performed per year it could easily be 30-50,000. As surgeries continue to rise in frequency even this

Maybe the ability to hope of change is big part of life it's self

                                                                              or the Dream of Becoming.

I just always have felt , I think having a penis just didn't fit my feelings, and a female like body fit me better

Problem least for me, very few vaginoplasty surgeries are being performed in U.S ,excerpt ; 


" Among transgender women, 92 percent of the procedures were breast or chest                 operations, and 7 percent were facial.                                                                                

  Only 15 operations, or 0.9 percent, were on the genitals."

One good thing is I've never been erect in presence of a male

except on a few rare times ;where close male friend with to perform fellatio on me, which was difficult for me to allow

Danielle Foxx before and after surgery one of few to be found
believe me I'd like to do same, yet hormone thing-makes it a No! for me

                                                  I have never had any real desire though to Pass as female either though

I do believe any so called Transgender male to female type person, surely must have some desire to  Attract a male partner, thus , surely understands  that male is most likely going to desire to have sex with them ! Thus for myself anyway, having a vagina is a big, big desire of being a " Female roled male. It would make it much easier, not to have to get my bottom clean prior to getting penetrated, would remove at least the Taboo-ness of anal sex,greatly improves my self-image toward  aligning with my sexual self.

                                                                                            For myself

                           It would be so great to tell a man I wish to date  " I am at least Ladylike in that , I have a Vagina "

                                                                         Yet for myself,it's to Late in the Game

The most basic Role of Female

For myself no matter how beautiful I think she is ↑, I know I never could, or can appear to represent the beauty;

                                         she can, yet I can be in the Role she represents.

                                                And that is to be "Bred " as a female can

                                                         Natures most basic call.


                                         I can try to do it as Artful, and respectful as I can.

                                                    And that's all I can hope to do.

                                                 To me that is the most basic aspect of being a Trans-female roled male.

                                                                  " The need to mate as though I am Female "


For myself it was a very important part of knowing that I was a " Female roled male ", that is " What type of arousal was I having ?

   for example; in the photo above, though I am attracted to her beauty, I not aroused by thought of having sex with her, I am aroused    by being in her Role, being penetrated as she is about to be.She represents my Role, that does sexual arouse.If I was there with        her , I would say to her " I want to do what your doing "

And no matter what people try to think, moralize, by Nature's design, the most basic reason a Female needs a male is to get his semen up inside her !,  all else follows ! - or else there would be no off-spring.

excerpt from site 

When we are aroused we are energized and 'feel alive'. There are three ways that arousal can be achieved: mentally, emotionally and physically, as described below.

Cognitive arousal

Cognitive, or intellectual, arousal is about thinking and mental stimulation. This is the state where we are exploring, learning and discovering interesting things. We are driven into this cognitively aroused state by curiosity, novelty and general interest.

Some people are more easily stimulated by cognitive arousal than others. When aroused, some are more focused on learning whilst others (often 'experts') are more likely to act to display and defend their pre-existing ideas and knowledge.

Affective arousal

Affective, or emotional, arousal happens when we are emotionally charged up and feel passionate about something. We may be angry, excited, scared, joyful or feeling the stimulation of any other emotion.

Some people fall easily into affective arousal and may be considered to have a volatile temperament.

Affective arousal is, in some ways, most central to arousal in that cognitive and physical arousal are more likely to be accompanied with some degree of emotional sensation. There is a less frequent direct connection between cognitive and physical arousal.

Physical arousal

Physical arousal occur where our bodies are in a heightened sense of arousal, typically with adrenaline coursing through our system and activating our muscles. Physical arousal includes both sexual arousal and the bodily activation we feel when we are engaged in sports and other physical exertions.

There are deeply programmed responses to physical threats which create arousal and action without cognitive intervention, for example when we jump out of the way of a falling branch or block a punch thrown at us.

Although we generally seek positive emotions, there is also an attraction to negative emotion, as evidenced in the many stories and movies that engender fear, sadness, anxiety and so on. Likewise many physical sports engender anger, fear and so on. What often happens in these situation is that, by some curious process, the negative emotion gets converted into pleasurable excitement.

I do worry, that this modern " fade " which it seem to be,  if your a male transgender type, One needs to " look " so passable; as a to pass as female, to be a Trans-female roled male, it is appearing as though it is not about the Role at all, but about " passing as", almost like it is a contest of " who can disguise themselves best.

 Thus before the Trans person was living in a disguised way (hiding their trans self, least I have ), then if I did completely look female, it would be another - disguise- hiding the fact that I was born with a male body, " I simple feel if I am going to have sex with a man, he needs to know that I am  a ; " trans- Female roled male", I've had enough Hiding!

                                                  I want to pass as a " Female Roled male ", not a female, not a male

                                                                                           Yet !

                                                                    I fully understand the need to " Pass "

                                                  A well known philosopher once said; " I can think, thus I exist ",
                                                                        yet we also must think cearly

A disguise can be anything which conceals or changes a person's physical appearance, including a wig, glasses, makeup, fake moustache, costume or other items. Camouflage is a type of disguise for people, animals and objects. Hats, glasses, changes in hair style or wigs, plastic surgery, and make-up are also used.