"Pre-Concieved Notions

-deprogramming them from our minds"


Next time I make a judgement,have a real need to pay Attention to problem. ,say, I am in the process of making a judgement of some one different then I ,I must be Aware of what,whom I am Comparing them too!,...every time we look out at the World, we are Subconsciously, comparing what we see to what we already have believed.

  Thus First, we must become Aware of the fact that this is even occurring.

       Thus a very important virtue is "Attention ", and meaning Attention to one's self.


       I think Comparing and Expections,should be called "constant companions", as I must notice if I am needing, a                        comfort,a safety, a thing to be as I wish it to be ?


       Because at this time in history,at least in America the "LGBTQ " topic is in the air, yet in reality has always been in the          air, for good part of American history,world history, I will use a thought of mine as example;

              I am fairly sure throught Human history,every culture there as been three gender identities, and just to keep things                               simply,lets just say that is a "Truth" (Plato would relate to this in Context of his "Forms" I believe ).. So lets assume this,                       Thus , when a youth is raised,society,school,parents,culture,,,instead of "to deny" truth- (all the LGBTQ, in it's basic                            form,really symbolizes, in my opinion)

                                                      So here we are 2018, did that seem so bad?

               That is to simply accept "reality", thus begin to teach reality, and stop comparing now, to what was then!

               If for example you see myself at the grocery store, and it's a warm summer day, this dress would be maybe be worn by a                    female in today's society,and be Appropriate, be in Context, to be wearing at the store, in most parts of America.

                  So say your there with your child of say 6 years old, if you say hi, act like humans act if wishing to live in peace,                   then say your child asks (after you've proceeded down the asile a bit), who is that, you simply say "I don't know                     who".....just as you would if I were a female. You soon see, how far behind culturally we are, in the replies, or 

                questions that might occur in this" simply interaction", for example, really since 1998, since beginning to model,                     then becoming aware I am of 3rd gender variety, I have been quite aware of societies pre-conceived notions, yet                     also how simply by raising children in way of teaching them "reality" it is to over-come them.?

9/14/2018- I awoke this morning with "why is Comparing so important to understand ?" on my mind, so think will make page on site                                                                 called " Comparing"

Now try to see from my point of view that I see as that similar to the "Berdache tradition", and the accept in it's simpliest form, "seeking a identity neither of male or female, yet in my case, because I do desire to wear dresses,appear more feminine, this like any other Lady(heterosexual) dresses in such away if single and available,,true? So, if I can portray myself of my true identity as a "third-gender type",I am greatly hindered of finding a "mate" of the type I desire, which in my case is a" heterosexual black male,self-actualized to a fairly high degree,willing to accept me in my Lady like role"

,...Hopefully one see's that this is a basic need of any human being, in a society, to be accepted as self, thus making it possible,and to it best degree of find,and live in harmony.     Yet if that Society does not teach the basic truth that is ,by teaching the reality on the topic of Gender , That is for me the raise a "Child", I must teach them "truth", a one is there is today at least 3- gender identities/with many variations of people in this world - people partner/mate/live with etc. with those they like,desire, there is no rule .

The Muse- As I began modeling for artists,I soon began to to see "Body role" and "Comparing", for example I was modeling for a University life drawing class, a high percentage females, when one of the girls said out loud " what a tiny penis,my boy-friends is a lot bigger",  the instructor quickly stated to her "that is very much out of Context",...un be known to her, here I am a Berdache type,feminine, so she was complimenting me!, as I have no desire of having a penis to be seen as a male aspect of self, verse in another class a female student commented out loud "Michael you have a nice "bottom" to compare the two , the first female, on penis size,her comment being negative for herself, she never returned to class due to her "ego", as not one person related to her comment,no giggled etc.So in essense was publicly Shamed!,she wasn't kicked out, she herself couldn't return, thus she never earned her degree in Fine Arts, as in order to get degree she had to have that class!,  where the student/female whom said I had a "nice bottom", though maybe a bit out of context, was seen by the group as positive, however what if it was a male student and he made that comment; "Michael you have a nice bottom" ?- would that make a male,with a very masculine/heterosexual identity uncomfortable?, myself it wouldn't as it happening similar yet, more on one on one interaction with male students. My "2nd Contact", was in a flirting type way,

Excerpts from "Why You Should Stop Comparing Yourself to Others"

          Mark Twain said that “comparison is the death of joy,” and the science agrees. Research has found that comparing breeds feelings of envy, low-self confidence, and depression, as well as compromises our ability to trust others. While downward comparison, comparing ourselves to those less fortunate, can provide some benefit to one’s sense of self, even this form of comparison comes at a price. It requires that we take pleasure in someone else’s failures or misfortunes in order to feel adequate, which can fuel mean-spirited competitiveness versus collaboration; jealousy versus connection. When comparing leads you to devalue yourself or others you’ve entered dangerous territory. 


What You Are Comparing Against Is Inaccurate Information

Let’s face it: What people present to the outside world is usually an edited version of their reality. When someone asks you how you are doing, how often do you respond by saying, “my husband is driving me crazy, I’m feeling like a failure at work, and I’m just about ready to lose my mind”? Instead, you probably bite your tongue and say “things are really great!” A recent study in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin confirmed that people are less likely to reveal their negative emotions than their positive emotions. Additionally, the study found that people tend to overestimate the presence of positivity in the lives of others, while they misinterpret or fail to detect negative feelings in others. So not only is what’s being delivered an incomplete picture, we tend to distort the information we do receive — a double whammy. So next time you find yourself comparing to someone else stop and ask yourself if it is really fair to compare when you don’t have all of the information. As Steve Furtick explains, “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” 


Ruminating about how someone else is better looking, has more friends, or is more successful than you is both time-consuming and ineffective. Being hard on ourselves actually zaps motivation and decreases goal completion. If you really want to live a life that feels fulfilling you need to dedicate your time and energy to your own values. To get your focus in the right place ask yourself the following questions: When you imagine yourself at the end of your life looking back at what you’ve done, what will be the experiences and accomplishments that will have been most important to you? What kind of person do you want to be? What kind of relationships do you want to have? What do you want people to remember about you? Use these personal values as the barometer upon which you compare, rather than the accomplishments of those around you.

Surrendering to Accept Reality

I thing one important thing to always keep in mind ,and is helpful when our minds are in conflict. Tell ourself "Surrender and Accept" that is Reality is as it is Now, sure our history always is banging on the door,..the following Story some what portrays what I am thinking:

Stephen Hawking -perhaps the person who lived longest with ALS, is one of our exemplars of the third principle of awareness: accept reality as it is. Acceptance does not imply a defeatist or even passive attitude. It is rather acknowledgement that there are life circumstances which require our surrender. Hawking, diagnosed at the young age of 21 (ALS develops more frequently later in life) was given 2 years to live. Had he died according to plan he would not have had to surrender for 55 more years to the indignities of an unresponsive body and we would not have observed the courage of a man who stubbornly willed himself to live in a body many would choose to forego.

At breakfast this morning my (six-year-old) daughter asked: “When did time begin?” and upon further inquiry provided: “Time goes on and on and on, but when does it start?” She was referring to the bigger question that perplexes many physicists and exercised much of Stephen Hawking’s creative genius. A fitting question for a morning thinking about Stephen Hawking.

The principle of accepting reality is particularly connected, in time, with our relationship to the past. In order to be “present” we need to accept the past as is, we cannot change the past (even if Hawking stated that from a quantum mechanics view, “the past is indefinite, and only exists as a spectrum of possibilities”).

What we can do is change our relationship with the past. Sometimes we do this by simply letting go, sometimes by reminiscing or rehashing the past (a hurt that has not gone away still needs to be processed for full acceptance). In this season, as winter turns to spring (here in the northern hemisphere), it is a time to consider our relationship to the past—to do a good “past cleanse” by examining our hurts, resentments, procrastinations, habits and identifications. Symbolically, this is the work of getting rid of those things, food, feelings, and attitudes that clutter and constrict our ability to begin anew. When does time begin? Now.

I realize I spell Pre-Concieved Notions different,,,I see Eve in it better ,like Eve in the "beginning"

I have always never liked groupthink,culturethink,bit of a rebel guess

First step to any thing is realizing the "Anything"

The ultimate way to deprogram one's self and I believe it is the Obligation of all able "Individuals,Leaders especially, is to work on "Self-Actualizing" / "Liberation from Self"

1. Let go of All of Humanities Formed "Belief systems",they only hinder,place over bearing hard ships on us,create your own Ethics.,we aren't primitive people anymore.

Where belief is born

Belief can make people do the strangest things. At one level, it provides a moral framework, sets preferences and steers relationships. On another, it can be devastating. Belief can manifest itself as prejudice or persuade someone to blow up themselves and others in the name of a political cause.
"Belief has been a most powerful component of human nature that has somewhat been neglected," says Peter Halligan, a psychologist at Cardiff University. "But it has been capitalised on by marketing agents, politics and religion for the best part of two millennia."

That is changing. Once the preserve of philosophers alone, belief is quickly becoming the subject of choice for many psychologists and neuroscientists. Their goal is to create a neurological model of how beliefs are formed, how they affect people and what can manipulate them.

And the latest steps in the research might just help to understand a little more about why the world is so fraught with political and social tension. Matthew Lieberman, a psychologist at the University of California, recently showed how beliefs help people's brains categorise others and view objects as good or bad, largely unconsciously. He demonstrated that beliefs (in this case prejudice or fear) are most likely to be learned from the prevailing culture.

When Lieberman showed a group of people photographs of expressionless black faces, he was surprised to find that the amygdala - the brain's panic button - was triggered in almost two-thirds of cases. There was no difference in the response between black and white people.

The amygdala is responsible for the body's fight or flight response, setting off a chain of biological changes that prepare the body to respond to danger well before the brain is conscious of any threat. Lieberman suggests that people are likely to pick up on stereotypes, regardless of whether their family or community agrees with them.


The work, published last month in Nature Neuroscience, is the latest in a rapidly growing field of research called "social neuroscience", a wide arena which draws together psychologists, neuroscientists and anthropologists all studying the neural basis for the social interaction between humans.

Traditionally, cognitive neuroscientists focused on scanning the brains of people doing specific tasks such as eating or listening to music, while social psychologists and social scientists concentrated on groups of people and the interactions between them. To understand how the brain makes sense of the world, it was inevitable that these two groups would have to get together.

"In the West, most of our physical needs are provided for. We have a level of luxury and civilisation that is pretty much unparalleled," says Kathleen Taylor, a neuroscientist at Oxford University. "That leaves us with a lot more leisure and more space in our heads for thinking."

Beliefs and ideas therefore become our currency, says Taylor. Society is no longer a question of simple survival; it is about choice of companions and views, pressures, ideas, options and preferences.

"It is quite an exciting development but for people outside the field, a very obvious one," says Halligan.

Understanding belief is not a trivial task, even for the seemingly simplest of human interactions. Take a conversation between two people. When one talks, the other's brain is processing information through their auditory system at a phenomenal rate. That person's beliefs act as filters for the deluge of sensory information and guide the brain's response.

Beliefs and ideas therefore become our currency, says Taylor. Society is no longer a question of simple survival; it is about choice of companions and views, pressures, ideas, options and preferences.

"It is quite an exciting development but for people outside the field, a very obvious one," says Halligan.

Understanding belief is not a trivial task, even for the seemingly simplest of human interactions. Take a conversation between two people. When one talks, the other's brain is processing information through their auditory system at a phenomenal rate. That person's beliefs act as filters for the deluge of sensory information and guide the brain's response.

Halligan says that belief takes the concept of memory a step further. "A belief is a mental architecture of how we interpret the world," he says. "We have lots of fluid things moving by - perceptions and so forth - but at the level of who our friends are and so on, those things are consolidated in crystallised knowledge units. If we did not have those, every time we woke up, how would we know who we are?"

These knowledge units help to assess threats - via the amygdala - based on experience. Ralph Adolphs, a neurologist at the University of Iowa, found that if the amygdala was damaged, the ability of a person to recognise expressions of fear was impaired. A separate study by Adolphs with Simon Baron-Cohen at Cambridge University showed that amygdala damage had a bigger negative impact on the brain's ability to recognise social emotions, while more basic emotions seemed unaffected.

This work on the amygdala shows it is a key part of the threat-assessment response and, in no small part, in the formation of beliefs. Damage to this alarm bell - and subsequent inability to judge when a situation might be dangerous - can be life-threatening. In hunter-gatherer days, beliefs may have been fundamental to human survival.

Neuroscientists have long looked at brains that do not function properly to understand how healthy ones work. Researchers of belief formation do the same thing, albeit with a twist. "You look at people who have delusions," says Halligan. "The assumption is that a delusion is a false belief. That is saying that the content of it is wrong, but it still has the construct of a belief."

In people suffering from prosopagnosia, for example, parts of the brain are damaged so that the person can no longer recognise faces. In the Cotard delusion, people believe they are dead. Fregoli delusion is the belief that the sufferer is constantly being followed around by people in disguise. Capgras' delusion, named after its discoverer, the French psychiatrist Jean Marie Joseph Capgras, is a belief that someone emotionally close has been replaced by an identical impostor.

Until recently, these conditions were regarded as psychiatric problems. But closer study reveals that, in the case of Capgras' delusion for example, a significant proportion of sufferers had lesions in their brain, typically in the right hemisphere.

"There are studies indicating that some people who have suffered brain damage retain some of their religious or political beliefs," says Halligan. "That's interesting because whatever beliefs are, they must be held in memory."

Another route to understanding how beliefs form is to look at how they can be manipulated. In her book on the history of brainwashing, Taylor describes how everyone from the Chinese thought reform camps of the last century to religious cults have used systematic methods to persuade people to change their ideas, sometimes radically.

The first step is to isolate a person and control what information they receive. Their former beliefs need to be challenged by creating uncertainty. New messages need to be repeated endlessly. And the whole thing needs to be done in a pressured, emotional environment.

"Beliefs are mental objects in the sense that they are embedded in the brain," says Taylor. "If you challenge them by contradiction, or just by cutting them off from the stimuli that make you think about them, then they are going to weaken slightly. If that is combined with very strong reinforcement of new beliefs, then you're going to get a shift in emphasis from one to the other."

The mechanism Taylor describes is similar to the way the brain learns normally. In brainwashing though, the new beliefs are inserted through a much more intensified version of that process.


This manipulation of belief happens every day. Politics is a fertile arena, especially in times of anxiety.

"Stress affects the brain such that it makes people more likely to fall back on things they know well - stereotypes and simple ways of thinking," says Taylor.

"It is very easy to want to do that when everything you hold dear is being challenged. In a sense, it was after 9/11."

The stress of the terror attacks on the US in 2001 changed the way many Americans viewed the world, and Taylor argues that it left the population open to tricks of belief manipulation. A recent survey, for example, found that more than half of Americans thought Iraqis were involved in the attacks, despite the fact that nobody had come out and said it.

This method of association uses the brain against itself. If an event stimulates two sets of neurons, then the links between them get stronger. If one of them activates, it is more likely that the second set will also fire. In the real world, those two memories may have little to do with each other, but in the brain, they get associated.

Taylor cites an example from a recent manifesto by the British National Party, which argues that asylum seekers have been dumped on Britain and that they should be made to clear up rubbish from the streets. "What they are trying to do is to link the notion of asylum seekers with all the negative emotions you get from reading about garbage, [but] they are not actually coming out and saying asylum seekers are garbage," she says.

The 9/11 attacks highlight another extreme in the power of beliefs. "Belief could drive people to agree to premeditate something like that in the full knowledge that they would all die," says Halligan of the hijacker pilots.

It is unlikely that beliefs as wide-ranging as justice, religion, prejudice or politics are simply waiting to be found in the brain as discrete networks of neurons, each encoding for something different. "There's probably a whole combination of things that go together," says Halligan.


And depending on the level of significance of a belief, there could be several networks at play. Someone with strong religious beliefs, for example, might find that they are more emotionally drawn into certain discussions because they have a large number of neural networks feeding into that belief.

"If you happen to have a predisposition, racism for example, then it may be that you see things in a certain way and you will explain it in a certain way," says Halligan.

He argues that the reductionist approach of social neuroscience will alter the way people study society. "If you are brain scanning, what are the implications for privacy in terms of knowing another's thoughts? And being able to use those, as some governments are implying, in terms of being able to detect terrorists and things like that," he says. "If you move down the line in terms of potential uses for these things, you have potential uses for education and for treatments being used as cognitive enhancers."

So far, social neuroscience has provided more questions than answers. Ralph Adolphs of the University of Iowa looked to the future in a review paper for Nature. "How can causal networks explain the many correlations between brain and behaviour that we are discovering? Can large-scale social behaviour, as studied by political science and economics, be understood by studying social cognition in individual subjects? Finally, what power will insights from cognitive neuroscience give us to influence social behaviour, and hence society? And to what extent would such pursuit be morally defensible?"

The answers to those questions may well shape people's understanding of what it really means to believe.-The Guardian

Social constructionism / wikipedia

Social constructionism or the social construction of reality (also social concept) is a theory of knowledge in sociology and communication theory that examines the development of jointly constructed understandings of the world that form the basis for shared assumptions about reality. The theory centers on the notions that human beings rationalize their experience by creating models of the social world and share and reify these models through language.[1


A social construct or construction concerns the meaning, notion, or connotation placed on an object or event by a society, and adopted by the inhabitants of that society with respect to how they view or deal with the object or event.[citation needed] In that respect, a social construct as an idea would be widely accepted as natural by the society, but may or may not represent a reality shared by those outside the society, and would be an "invention or artifice of that society".[2][need quotation to verify]

A major focus of social constructionism is to uncover the ways in which individuals and groups participate in the construction of their perceived social reality. It involves looking at the ways social phenomena are developed, institutionalized, known, and made into tradition by humans.

Teleology of social construction

The concepts of weak and strong as applied to opposing philosophical positions, "isms", inform a teleology – the goal-oriented, meaningful or "final end" of an interpretation of reality. "Isms" are not personal opinions, but the extreme, modal, formulations that actual persons, individuals, can then consider, and take a position between. There are opposing philosophical positions concerning the feasibility of co-creating a common, shared, social reality, called weak and strong.

John R. Searle does not elucidate the terms strong and weak in his book The Construction of Social Reality,[33] but he clearly uses them in his Chinese room argument, where he debates the feasibility of creating a computing machine with a sharable understanding of reality, and he adds "We are precisely such machines." Strong artificial intelligence (Strong AI) is the bet that computer programmers will somehow eventually achieve a computing machine with a mind of its own, and that it will eventually be more powerful than a human mind. Weak AI bets they won't.

David Deutsch in his book The Fabric of Reality uses a form of strong Turing principle to share Frank Tipler's view of the final state of the universe as an omnipotent (but not omniscient), Omega point, computer. But this computer is a society of creative thinkers, or people (albeit posthuman transhuman persons), having debates in order to generate information, in the never-ending attempt to attain omniscience of this physics—its evolutionary forms, its computational abilities, and the methods of its epistemology—having an eternity to do so. (p. 356)

Because both the Chinese room argument and the construction of social reality deal with Searle and his debates, and because they both use weak and strong to denote a philosophical position, and because both debate the programmability of "the other", it is worth noting the correspondence that "strong AI" is strong social constructionism, and "weak AI" is weak social constructivism.

Strong social constructiv"ism" says "none are able to communicate either a full reality or an accurate ontology, therefore my position must impose, by a sort of divine right, my observer-relative epistemology", whereas weak social constructivism says "none are able to know a full reality, therefore we must cooperate, informing and conveying an objective ontology as best we can."[34]


Society has undergone a mass brainwashing and it is time for us to deprogram ourselves in order to be completely immersed in the evolution of consciousness.


Deprogramming refers to measures that claim to assist[1] a person who holds a controversial belief system in changing those beliefs and abandoning allegiance to the religious, political, economic, or social group associated with the belief system.[2][3] The dictionary definition of deprogramming is "to free" or "to retrain" someone from specific beliefs.[4] Some controversial methods and practices of self-identified "deprogrammers" have involved kidnapping, false imprisonment, and coercion,[5] which have sometimes resulted in criminal convictions of the deprogrammers.[6][7] Some deprogramming regimens are designed for individuals taken against their will, which has led to controversies over freedom of religion, kidnapping, and civil rights, as well as the violence which is sometimes involved.[8]

1. Religion

If a UFO were to land in your backyard tonight, I promise the ET will not have either a bible or money. Religion has been the longest running form of mind control on the planet and has served to not only keep us separated, but to depopulate the world through numerous wars, Inquisitions and Crusades in the name of “God”.

What religion does not teach us is that we are powerful, spiritual beings without them.

In the next few months or years, we can look forward to religion’s next form of mind control as they admit to the presence of extraterrestrial beings. This, of course, will not fall into the bible’s timeline, unless they try to convince their followers that the ET’s have only been around for the last 6,000 years as well. If that were true, then why are they so much more advanced than we are if they are able to travel light years to visit us?- from themindunleashed.com / deprogram yourself

VI. Self-awareness: Becoming aware of your own worldview (Adapted from Buhin et al. 2004)

1. Learning About Your Own Culture
2. Understanding Your Personal Worldview
3. Appreciating Your Own Multiple Identities
4. Acknowledging assumptions and biases.
5. Accepting Responsibility and Tolerating Ambiguity
6. Recognizing Limits of Your Competence

1. Learning About Your Own Culture

According to Tervalon and Murray-Garcia, cultural self-awareness requires a life-long commitment to self-evaluation and critique (14). Before entering into a client-caregiver relationship, the individual must become aware of her/his cultural and historical background. By recognizing the different influences from his/her cultural background, the individual will be able to recognize the different influences in the client’s background and will be more likely to engage in a sensitive, therapeutic relationship.

Exercise #1: Adapted from http://www.leron-line.com/Cultural_Self_Assessment.htm

Think of yourself as a cultural being whose life has been influenced by various historical, social, political, economic, and geographical circumstances. This exercise will help you become aware of your historical, ethnic and cultural background.

  1. Where were you born?
  2. When were you born?
  3. Where did you grow up?
  4. Where did your parents grow up?
  5. Where did your grandparents grow up?
  6. Where did your great grandparents grow up?
  7. What is your earliest memory as a family?
  8. What is your earliest school memory?
  9. As a family, what events did you celebrate?
  10. Have you traveled or moved as a child?
  11. Have you traveled or moved as an adult?
  12. Recall on international event that happened before you turned 18. Try to answer the following: Who was involved, what was the event, where did it happen, how did it happen, and why did it happen?
  13. Recall an event that happened in the country where you were born, before you turned 18. Try to answer the following: Who was involved, what was the event, where did it happen, how did it happen, and why did it happen?
  14. What is your earliest recollection as a member of a group?
  15. What was your first job?
  16. As an adult, what events or holidays do you currently celebrate?

2. Understanding Your Own Worldview

Since our perceptions are shaped by our view of the world, the caregiver needs to examine and understand how she/he sees the world.  One’s worldview is learned through socialization, from childhood to adulthood, and constantly reinforced by the culture in which we live. It is the taken-for-granted view of “the way things are” and most of the time unquestioned and invisible.

“To understand worldviews, therefore, we must examine the beliefs/belief systems and the social values that they contain.” (LeBaron, M. 2003). An example of a belief system was Social Darwinism which held that life is a struggle for survival and dominance, and the most competent and hard-working individuals will be most successful, while the incompetent and inferior will be the least successful.

What is your worldview?

One Western worldview is “I am the captain of my soul,”
which is in contrast to the worldview of “God will provide” which other cultures hold.

When one is blind to his own culture, he will not be able to see the differences in values between cultures. This could lead to cultural destructiveness, cultural imposition and cultural pain. This stems from cultural ignorance of one’s own and other’s cultural identities, due to intentional or unintentional isolation or separation. This leads to dehumanizing others with different values than one’s own. The greater the difference, the more negative the evaluation of the other culture (16)


The manner of their living is very barbarous, because they do not eat at fixed times, but as often as they please. Amerigo Vespucci, when he discovered America.


Exercise #2:  How do you view the following?


Aspects of Worldview

What is your worldview?


(Time is money?)

Space between you and the next person

(When do you start feeling uncomfortable?)


(Work relationships vs. personal relationships)


( How do you see technology?)

Religion or spirituality

(What about religion?)


(Tell the truth no matter what.)


3. Appreciating Your Own Multiple Identities

We all live within and identify with multiple identities. Most of us can claim different identities related to gender, age, religion, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, profession, national origin, educational level, etc.

When working with clients from other cultures, the caregiver should examine differences and similarities between herself/himself and the client. The caregiver takes into account  “issues related to diversity, marginalization, and vulnerability due to culture, race, gender, and sexual orientation (National Academy of Nursing expert panel, 1990.)

By recognizing one’s multiple identities, one is less likely to stereotype others based on minimal information about another person’s historical, social, and cultural backgrounds.

What are the shared identities between two 30-year-old men, one is  a 30-year-old nurse who works full-time, goes to school in the evenings to work on his master’s degree and raises three children and another 30-year-old man who works at two jobs and raises three children?

Exercise # 3. “I am_."

Take a blank sheet of paper and write the numbers 1-10 on the left hand column. Complete the statement “I am______” using the first words that come to mind.


What were your first 5 answers? When did you start to slow down in writing your answers?

What were the last 3 answers? Do you feel that your list accurately captures your multiple identities?


4. Acknowledging assumptions and biases

ANA Code of Ethics: Nurse provides care with respect to the inherent worth of the individual. “The nurse establishes relationships and provides care with respect to human needs and values, and without prejudice.”(Provision 1.1, 1.2. ANA Code of Ethics.) (17)

 “Culturally skilled counselors possess knowledge and understanding about how oppression, racism, discrimination, and stereotyping affect them personally and in their work. This allows them to acknowledge their own racist attitudes, beliefs, and feelings” (18)

 Caregivers are expected to be aware of their own cultural identifications in order to control their personal biases that interfere with the therapeutic relationship. Self-awareness involves not only examining one’s culture, but also examining perceptions and assumptions about the client’s culture.

Through a self-reflective assessment of their personal values, attitudes, and assumptions about other cultures, and articulating these assumptions and attitudes, the caregiver will gain the ability to sort out or “bracket” the influences of their own cultural background in order to provide respectful and unbiased care. (20)

Exercise # 4: Answer the following questions:


  1. What racial group do you identify with?
  2. What ethnic group(s) do you identify with?
  3. What socioeconomic class do you identify with?
  4. What is your earliest memory of belonging in a group (other than your family)?
  5. What is your earliest memory of being excluded from a group?
  6. What is your earliest memory of excluding someone from a group?


Exercise 5: Adapted from Luckman (1999)

How do you relate to various groups of people in society? Please answer honestly, not as you think might be socially or professionally desirable. Please do not record your answers for this exercise.

Level of response:


  1. I feel I can genuinely try to help this person without prejudice.
  2. Even though I do not agree with this person, I feel I can accept this person as he is and comfortable enough to listen to him/her.
  3. I do not feel that I have the background knowledge or experience to help this person.
  4. I feel uncomfortable taking care of this person.
  5. I feel biased and prejudiced against this person.


Your Response

Iranian immigrant


Child abuser


Mexican American


Elderly person with dementia




Methodist minister




Unmarried expectant teen


White Anglo-saxon American




Anorexic teenager


Morbidly obese man in his 30s




Person with AIDS


Person with cancer


Person who does not speak English



5. Accepting Responsibility and Tolerating Ambiguity

Caregivers accept responsibility for the continuous process of becoming “aware of their own assumptions about human behavior, values, biases, preconceived notions, personal limitations, and so forth” (Sue et al., 1998, p.38).

Tolerating ambiguity means the caregiver

Watch Out for Preconceived Notions and Limiting Beliefs  / innerself.com

We all have opinions, beliefs, preconceived notions, etc. And I've noticed, in myself and others, a tendency to discount anything that falls outside of what we've decided we "like".

For example, when I discovered a country and western singer whose songs I liked, I found on his website that he was giving a concert about 60 miles from my house that very weekend. Did I go? I'm sorry to say no. Why? Well, all my preconceived notions popped up... I don't like crowds, I'd have to drive sixty miles to get home at night after a concert and I'd be tired, my husband probably wouldn't want to go, country and western crowds aren't my style, yada, yada, yada...

So rather than say "Wow, look what the Universe has arranged for me. A concert close to home just as I've discovered this singer whose songs I like", I instead went with my limiting beliefs and "preconceived judgments" and did not go. And then about a week later, it hit me! I'd been handed a gift, and I turned it down because of my preconceived ideas about what I "like" and "don't like". The Universe had arranged a wonderful treat for me, and I said, "thanks, but no thanks, not my style". So the door was open, and I slammed it shut not even bothering to consider what wondrous gift/experience might be waiting for me.

Making Choices Based on Limiting Beliefs

Now, I'm sure that you can think of such examples in your life. To give you another example, the other day, a good friend of mine who is retired was invited to a "dinner & dance" evening. She told me she wasn't going to go because she'd been to those kind of events throughout her career and she'd had enough of them. They were not any fun and you were "stuck" sitting betwen two people and had to talk to them all evening.

Now of course, since it's easier to see the "mote in someone else's eye" than in your own, I immediately "got on her case". I told her she was assuming it would be the same as in her past, and plus, she wouldn't be working, she'd be there to enjoy herself, etc. etc. It was easy for me to see how she was limiting herself by her preconceived ideas of what she liked and didn't like...  Luckily for her, she decided to go (after my wrangling, how could she not) and she had a great time! She ended up "dancing all night" and she's 80 years old. She also mentioned to me how there was a 93 year old woman there who also had a great time and danced all evening. How's that for letting go of preconceived notions and being willing to open yourself to new experiences.

The moral of the story? Treat every experience as brand new. Approach it as something you've never done, never heard of, never judged, never had a preconceived opinion about. Simply trust that if the Universe is sending something your way, there is a Divine reason for it and there will be a blessing in the experience if you remain open to it.

About The Author

Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal growth, and well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of joy and creativity.

Where does the word religion come from?

The word "religion" comes from the Latin word "religio" which has a meaning influenced by the verb "religare" to bind, in the sense of "place an obligation on" (World Book Dictionary).


  The Latin term religiō, origin of the modern lexeme religion (via Old French/Middle Latin[2]) is of ultimately obscure etymology. It is recorded beginning in the 1st century BC, i.e. in Classical Latin at the beginning of the Roman Empire, notably by Cicero, in the sense of "scrupulous or strict observance of the traditional cultus".-Wikipedia

The anthropology of religion, as well as evidence for spirituality or cultic behavior in the Upper Paleolithic, and similarities in great ape behavior.

Primates, in particular great apes, are candidates for being able to experience empathy and theory of mind. Great apes have complex social systems; young apes and their mothers have strong bonds of attachment and when a baby chimpanzee[38] or gorilla[39] dies, the mother will not uncommonly carry the body around for several days. Jane Goodall has described chimpanzees as exhibiting mournful behavior.[40] Koko, a gorilla trained to use sign language, was reported to have expressed vocalisations indicating sadness after the death of her pet cat, All Ball.[41]

Cult (religious practice) 

In Christianity

In the Catholic Church, outward religious practice in cultus is the technical term for Roman Catholic devotions or veneration extended to a particular saint, not to the worship of God. Catholicism and the Eastern Orthodox Church make a major distinction between latria, the worship that is offered to God alone, and dulia, which is veneration offered to the saints, including the veneration of Mary, whose veneration is often referred to as hyperdulia.

Abusive power and control Wikipedia

Abusive power and control (also controlling behaviour, coercive control and sharp power) is the way that an abusive person gains and maintains power and control over another person, as a victim, in order to subject that person to psychological, physical, sexual, or financial abuse. The motivations of the abusive person are varied, such as personal gain, personal gratification, psychological projection, devaluation, envy or just for the sake of it as the abuser may simply enjoy exercising power and control.

Controlling abusers use tactics to exert power and control over their victims. The tactics themselves are psychologically and sometimes physically abusive. Control may be helped through economic abuse thus limiting the victim's actions as they may then lack the necessary resources to resist the abuse.[1] The goal of the abuser is to control and intimidate the victim or to influence them to feel that they do not have an equal voice in the relationship.[2]

Manipulators and abusers control their victims with a range of tactics, including positive reinforcement (such as praise, flattery, ingratiation, love bombing, smiling, gifts, attention), negative reinforcement, intermittent or partial reinforcement, psychological punishment (such as nagging, silent treatment, swearing, threats, intimidation, emotional blackmail, guilt trips, inattention) and traumatic tactics (such as verbal abuse or explosive anger).[3]

The vulnerabilities of the victim are exploited with those who are particularly vulnerable being most often selected as targets.[3][4][5] Traumatic bonding can occur between the abuser and victim as the result of ongoing cycles of abuse in which the intermittent reinforcement of reward and punishment creates powerful emotional bonds that are resistant to change and a climate of fear.[6] An attempt may be made to normalise, legitimise, rationalise, deny, or minimise the abusive behaviour, or blame the victim for it.[7][8][9]

Isolation, gaslighting, mind games, lying, disinformation, propaganda, destabilisation and divide and rule are other strategies that are often used. The victim may be plied with alcohol or drugs to help disorientate them.

Certain personality types feel particularly compelled to control other people.

Leo's "Self-Deceptions,part 1,2 and 3 ,I feel are closely related to "Pre-Concieved Notions"