MichaelEmeryArt

     Why did Nature create a Third-Gender variety

                                           I personally feel I am  "By Instinct or By Innateness " a " Female Roled Male "

                                                      Thus I have to mate with males in order to fulfill that Role,


                                                                               To be Impregnated with Semen'


                                                                         In Order to do this , I must attract a male,


                                    After years of self inquiry, this is most basic driving force within me, in terms of sexual need.


             Or one might say a over-whelming desire to be "Bred", could be by a man, or New species with a penis and Semen !


                My own Theory is, in my case any way " I was born to distract / occupy breeding males away from the girls ", 


                                         Thus was born with a strong desire to be Female like / Female sexually Roled ,


                                  Simply had this desire all my life, never has gone away, as much as have tried to make it!

I believe now as the "Two-Spirit way" ,we as between male and female ,we have or can have a different connection with Nature,better understand "That we are all - Of the Body of Nature- Nature's Body,Gods Body."

I personally didn't wake up one morning ,and decide to be a "Fem-male type person" and due believe that to a high degree I was Predisposed or born with much more "Feminine type traits",then most males.

It has been a life long struggle to try to not to reveal my "Feminine traits",to try to be like a "real normal male". I can't begin to explain the mental anguish,depression,cognitive dissonance of fighting a internal battle.So why would any male choose to be like myself?- one that modern society,the majority consider strange and odd at best, threatening and freaky, and should simply go away and die or be Eliminated at worse. -Believe me,I have had people tell me   to go kill myself-!

I love this picture because I can see myself as what the French early explorers called a "Berdache" (a Native American transvestite), working with the women and children,,and when the men return from hunting, and one or more of the men have sexual need ,they can choose me to treat as a→ Female sexually,thus fulfilling a need of the "tribe" for all.

 Because I have the feelings more like a "Female",it is easy for me to be in the sexual role as a female would. I can see one or a group of the unattached males (no females for them),taking me somewhere secluded on this river,and as we stand out in the river, he or they take turns "boning" me(gang-bang me) and it would be very accepted as a way the tribe functioned,so everyones needs where fulfilled. I have wondered if they practiced "Fellatio" then,what type of sex was used→ would I masturbate one,while one boned me,and sucked one's cock ?

   ♣ It would be my guess, the Berdache could of helped eliminated Jealousy in the tribe,especially if there was a higher ratio of                males then females.

    ♣  When did "Mating" or the act of →become shameful, or secret, something not talked of etc.Was it introduced by the Europeans?

    ♣  For example,if you where a Observer from another planet see American Cinema, Violence is not only not suppressed !,it is                   demanded by the public or is this what the Movie Makers simply give?, thus accepted by the public,,Yet nudity is highly                       Suppressed! → who,when did people begin thinking Nudity needs Suppressed ,due to it being Harmful ? to myself this is a                 →base for brewing of a view of distorted reality→ creation of a mental illness in a entire society.

         " So the Observer,might simply conclude,"These People love Violence,yet are ashamed of their own bodies "
Waiting for the Men to come home from hunt

I have been roaming the Woods nude,all my life,since early youth. believe me even the wildlife doesn't fear me, as when clothed,they have evolved to know people as "Clothed" and to be feared!.

I truly hope my nudity doesn't offend,yet I have to be myself

For example I am only wearing these leggings, because of the weeds,undergrowth of summer,I am not trying to be Provocative,Yet that's not to say,I can't wait til the young men of the Tribe return from the Hunt,so I can please them as a Fem-male ! everything has it's time and place,a act is "Appropriate" when the time is right,yet not ,when it is not.

Winkte (also spelled wíŋtke) is the contraction of an old Lakota word, winyanktehca, meaning '[wants] to be like a woman'.[1] Historically, the winkte have been considered a social category of male-bodied people who adopt the clothing, work, and mannerisms that Lakota culture usually considers feminine


      Not a women, Like as for a femininity / sexual role

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The Bonobo-long with the common chimpanzee, the bonobo is the closest extant relative to humans.[4] Because the two species are not proficient swimmers, the formation of the Congo River 1.5–2 million years ago possibly led to the speciation of the bonobo. Bonobos live south of the river, and thereby were separated from the ancestors of the common chimpanzee, which live north of the river. There is no concrete data on population numbers, but the estimate is between 29,500 and 50,000 individuals. The species is listed as Endangered on the IUCN Red List and is threatened by habitat destruction and human population growth and movement, though commercial poaching is the most prominent threat. They typically live 40 years in captivity;[5] their lifespan in the wild is unknown.

Peacefulness[edit]

Bonobo (Pan paniscus) mother and infant at Lola ya Bonobo

Observations in the wild indicate that the males among the related common chimpanzee communities are hostile to males from outside the community. Parties of males 'patrol' for the neighboring males that might be traveling alone, and attack those single males, often killing them.[65] This does not appear to be the behavior of bonobo males or females, which seem to prefer sexual contact over violent confrontation with outsiders.[4] In fact, the Japanese scientists[specify] who have spent the most time working with wild bonobos describe the species as extraordinarily peaceful, and de Waal has documented how bonobos may often resolve conflicts with sexual contact (hence the "make love, not war" characterization for the species). Between groups, social mingling may occur, in which members of different communities have sex and groom each other, behavior which is unheard of among common chimpanzees. Conflict is still possible between rival groups of bonobos, but no official scientific reports of it exist.

The ranges of bonobos and chimpanzees are separated by the Congo River, with bonobos living to the south of it, and chimpanzees to the north.[66][67] It has been hypothesized that bonobos are able to live a more peaceful lifestyle in part because of an abundance of nutritious vegetation in their natural habitat, allowing them to travel and forage in large parties.[68]

Recent studies show that there are significant brain differences between bonobos and chimps. The brain anatomy of bonobos has more developed and larger regions assumed to be vital for feeling empathy, sensing distress in others and feeling anxiety, which makes them less aggressive and more empathic than their close relatives. They also have a thick connection between the amygdala, an important area that can spark aggression, and the ventral anterior cingulate cortex, which helps control impulses. This thicker connection may make them better at regulating their emotional impulses and behavior.[69]

Bonobo society is dominated by females, and severing the lifelong alliance between mothers and their male offspring may make them vulnerable to female aggression.[4] De Waal has warned of the danger of romanticizing bonobos: "All animals are competitive by nature and cooperative only under specific circumstances" and that "when first writing about their behaviour, I spoke of 'sex for peace' precisely because bonobos had plenty of conflicts. There would obviously be no need for peacemaking if they lived in perfect harmony."[70]

Surbeck and Hohmann showed in 2008 that bonobos sometimes do hunt monkey species. Five incidents were observed in a group of bonobos in Salonga National Park, which seemed to reflect deliberate cooperative hunting. On three occasions, the hunt was successful, and infant monkeys were captured and eaten.[ wikipedia



Female Lead

While much has been written about this dangerous turn of events, little has been written about its origins. Two trailblazing studies in the field – Boy Wives and Female Husbands edited by Stephen O Murray and Will Roscoe, and Heterosexual Africa? by Marc Epprecht – demolish the revisionist arguments about Africa's sexual history. From the 16th century onwards, homosexuality has been recorded in Africa by European missionaries, adventurers and officials who used it to reinforce ideas of African societies in need of Christian cleansing.

The Portuguese were among the first Europeans to explore the continent. They noted the range of gender relations in African societies and referred to the "unnatural damnation" of male-to-male sex in Congo. Andrew Battell, an English traveller in the 1590s, wrote this of the Imbangala of Angola: "They are beastly in their living, for they have men in women's apparel, whom they keep among their wives."

Transvestism occurred in many different places, including Madagascar and Ethiopia. Among the Pangwe people of present-day Cameroon and Gabon, homosexual intercourse was practised between males of all ages. It was believed to be a way to transmit wealth. The Nzima of Ghana had a tradition of adult men marrying each other, usually with an age difference of about 10 years. Similar to the pederasty of ancient Greece, Sudan's Zande tribe had a tradition of warriors marrying boys and paying a bride price, as they would for girl brides, to their parents. When the boy grew up, he too became a warrior and took a boy-wife.

In this same tribe lesbianism was practised in polygamous households. In the 18th century the Khoikhoi of South Africa used the word koetsire to describe men considered sexually receptive to other men, and soregus was the word they used for a friendship which involved same-sex masturbation.

Homosexuality is also recorded among the Siwa of Egypt. It was considered a boy's rite of passage in Benin, and woman-woman marriages involving a bride price existed in more than 30 African societies from Nigeria to Kenya to South Africa.



How far back can homosexuality be traced in Africa? You cannot argue with rock paintings. Thousands of years ago, the San people of Zimbabwe depicted anal sex between men. The truth is that, like everywhere else, African people have expressed a wide range of sexualities. Far from bringing homosexuality with them, Christian and Islamic forces fought to eradicate it. By challenging the continent's indigenous social and religious systems, they helped demonise and persecute homosexuality in Africa, paving the way for the taboos that prevail today.

I am second born / middle child

Excerpt from;  Wikipedia/ birth order  


              

Sexual orientation

The fraternal birth order effect is the name given to the theory that the more older brothers a man has, the greater the probability is that he will have a homosexual orientation. The fraternal birth order effect is said to be the strongest known predictor of sexual orientation, with each older brother increasing a man's odds of being gay by approximately 33%.[20][21] (One of the largest studies to date, however, suggests a smaller effect, of 15% higher odds.[22][23]) Even so, the fraternal birth order effect only accounts for a maximum of one seventh of the prevalence of homosexuality in men. There seems to be no effect on sexual orientation in women, and no effect of the number of older sisters.

In Homosexuality, Birth Order, and Evolution: Toward an Equilibrium Reproductive Economics of Homosexuality, Edward M. Miller suggests that the birth order effect on homosexuality may be a by-product of an evolved mechanism that shifts personality away from heterosexuality in laterborn sons.[24] According to Miller, this would have the consequence of reducing the probability of these sons engaging in unproductive competition with each other. Evolution may have favored biological mechanisms prompting human parents to exert affirmative pressure toward heterosexual behavior in earlier-born children: As more children in a family survive infancy and early childhood, the continued existence of the parents' gene line becomes more assured (cf. the pressure on newly-wed European aristocrats, especially young brides, to produce "an heir and a spare"), and the benefits of encouraging heterosexuality weigh less strongly against the risk of psychological damage that a strongly heteronormative environment poses to a child predisposed toward homosexuality.

More recently, this birth order effect on sexuality in males has been attributed to a very specific biological occurrence. As the mother gives birth to more sons, she is thought to develop an immunity to certain male-specific antigens. This immunity then leads to an effect in the brain that has to do with sexual preference. Yet this biological effect is seen only in right-handed males. If not right-handed, the number of older brothers has been found to have no prediction on the sexuality of a younger brother. This has led researchers to consider if the genes for sexuality and handedness are somehow related.[25]

Not all studies, including some with large, nationally representative samples, have been able to replicate the fraternal birth order effect. Some did not find any statistically significant difference in the sibling composition of gay and straight men;[26][27] this includes the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health,[28] the largest U.S. study with relevant data on the subject. Furthermore, at least one study, on the familial correlates of joining a same-sex union or marriage in a sample of two million people in Denmark, found that the only sibling correlate of joining a same-sex union among men was having older sisters, not older brothers.


Researchers note that men may be more likely to be homosexual if they share their birth mother with older brothers. Each older brother increases a man’s odds of being homosexual by approximately 33%.-Birth Order May Affect Homosexuality

excerpt from; Fraternal birth order and male sexual orientation 


     The fraternal birth order effect has been observed in androphilic male-to-female (MtF) transsexuals: MtF transsexuals who are sexually interested in men (also called "homosexual transsexuals") have a greater number of older brothers than MtF transsexuals who are sexually interested in women (also called "heterosexual transsexuals"). This has been reported in samples from Canada,[65] the United Kingdom,[61] the Netherlands,[66] and Polynesia.[67]

Growing up my dream was to be Secretary of State

, I liked- Henry Alfred Kissinger's (January 20, 1969 – November 3, 1975) job, if people asked me,what I wanted to be when I grew up?..I would say  Secretary of State

Because middle-borns are sandwiched between younger and older siblings who wanted things done their way, middle children are often the ones to propose to compromise, often at their own expense.[6]

Second BornMediator, fewest pictures in the family photo album, avoids conflict, independent, extremely loyal to the peer group, many friends, relaxed, diplomatic, easily persuaded, realistic about own talents and abilities, champion of the underdog


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HOMOSEXUAL MALE-TO-FEMALE TRANSSEXUALISM

Bailey, J. M., Department of Psychology, Northwestern University, 2029 Sheridan Rd., Evanston, Illinois 60208-2710 (email: jm-baileyatnwu.edu)
 
Blanchard has distinguished two types of males who become females: autogynephilic and homosexual transsexuals. My talk will focus on the latter.

Although many find the term "homosexual male-to-female transsexuals confusing, I retain this term to emphasize, after Blanchard, that such individuals are a form of homosexual male. Specifically, they are very feminine gay men who choose to become women. The large majority of homosexual male-to-female transsexuals are unambiguously and strongly attracted to (heterosexual) men and have extensive sexual experience with men. This is perhaps the best way to distinguish homosexual and autogynephilic transsexuals, although it must be done carefully because some autogynephilics have homosexual fantasies. In the first part of my talk, I present interview/questionnaire data comparing heterosexual men, gay men, drag queens (who are intermediate between gay men and homosexual transsexuals), and homosexual transsexuals. The common notion that transsexuals are "women trapped in men's bodies" is partly true and partly false. In the second part of my talk I summarize less systematically investigated clinical impressions that should be studied further.



Reading the above; my sexual fantasies are and have always been to be in the receptived / passive role of being mounted and bred by a male, as well as appearing Feminine,thus displaying non-interested in being in a masculine male role,being in the female role.

 Yet if a female asked me to perform oral sex(Cunnilingus) on her, I could.as pleased-I would have no need to climax myself.

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excerpts from; A Third Sex Around the World

    The indigenous cultures of South and East Africa have a long history of homosexuality, transgender behavior, and even same-sex marriage between both men and women.  In early seventeenth-century Luanda (the capital of Portuguese Angola), Catholic priests Gaspar Azevereduc and Antonius Sequerius documented third-gender natives known as chibados.  The chibados dressed like women, spoke effeminately and married other men “to unite in wrongful lust with them.”  More shocking to the priests was the fact that such marriages were honored and even prized among the tribesmen.  In a similar record, Portuguese Jesuit Joao dos Santos wrote in 1625 that the chibados of southwestern Africa were “attyred like women, and behave themselves womanly, ashamed to be called men; are also married to men, and esteeme that unnaturale damnation an honor.”  In his writings about seventeenth-century Angola, historian Antonio Cardonega mentioned that sodomy was “rampant among the people of Angola.  They pursue their impudent and filthy practices dressed as women.”  He also stated that the sodomites often served as powerful shamans, were highly esteemed among most Angolan tribes and commonly called quimbanda.


The earliest recordings of homosexuality in Africa come to us from the ancient San rock paintings of Zimbabwe.  Dated back many thousands of years, some of the images depict “egregious sexual practices” such as male-to-male copulation.  In what is now southwestern Zimbabwe, Livingstone noticed “immorality” among the younger natives and asserted, in 1865, that the elderly chief’s polygamous monopolization of women was responsible for the sin.  Among the Shona tribes of Zimbabwe, no words exist for genital or orgasm but there is a word for homosexual—ngochane.  In northwestern Zambia, Victor Turner reported boy circumcision ceremonies in which the young initiates mimed oral copulation with older males, and in 1920, Edwin Smith and Andrew Dale documented an Ila tribesman who crossdressed, worked and slept with the women but did not have sexual relations with them.  The Ila tribes called such men mwaami or “prophet.”


In the nineteenth century, Great Britain controlled the interior regions of southern Africa and granted exclusive mining rights to British magnate Cecil Rhodes in the 1880s.  The region was subsequently divided into Southern and Northern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe and Zambia), and the British South Africa Company was established.  The lucrative mining industry attracted migrant workers from all over southern Africa and crowded, all-male camps fostered an increase in homosexual relationships that were modified according to various tribal customs.  The British noticed the homosexual behavior at the camps and from 1892 to 1923 Southern Rhodesia tried over 250 sodomy cases.  During the trials, the most common defense put forward was that sodomy had been a longstanding “custom” among African natives.  Black Rhodesians were typically punished with less than a year in prison for the crime while Whites often received longer sentences.  By the 1920s, however, court magistrates began dismissing all sodomy cases deemed consensual.


In the 1920s, American anthropologist Felix Bryk noted homosexual bachelors among the Bagishu and Maragoli tribes of Tanzania and western Kenya.  He claimed that such “hermaphrodites” were numerous and called inzili by the Bagishu and kiziri among the Maragoli.  In 1909, British anthropologist Sir Claud Hollis observed Nandi circumcision ceremonies in Kenya wherein the boys wore female clothes for eight weeks prior to the ritual.  A similar crossdressing rite was found within Maasai initiation ceremonies.  The Meru tribes of Kenya have a religious leadership role known as mugawe, which involves priests wearing female clothing and hairstyles.  In 1973, British ethnologist Rodney Needham noted that the mugawe were often homosexual and sometimes married to other men.  Traditional Bori practices were also observed among the Mabasha tribes of Kenya.

Sekrata in Madagascar

In Madagascar, for the Sakalava people recognized a third gender called Sekrata. Boys in Sakalava communities who exhibit traditionally feminine behavior or personalities are raised by parents as girls from a young age.

Instead of labeling these boys as gay, they are seen as having a male body and identifying as a female. Sexual preference is not a factor for the Sakalava and raising a child in this third gender is natural and accepted in the community’s social fabric.


“I feel like a mermaid. My body tells me that I am a man but my soul tells me that I am a woman. I am like a flower, a flower that is made of paper. I shall always be loved from a distance, never to be touched and no smell to fall in love with.” Heena, 51, is a hijra: a term, according to Bangladeshi photographer Shahria Sharmin, that has “no exact match in the modern western taxonomy of gender”.

A good example of how Society creates Evil/non-harmony,negative beliefs;

While joining a hijra group offers stability, choosing their new identity means making themselves vulnerable in a society that increasingly sees them as outcasts. “Transcending the biological definition, hijras are more of social phenomena as a minority group and have a long-recorded history in South Asia,” says Sharmin. She notes that “traditionally, hijras held semi-sacred status and were hired to sing, dance, and bless newly married couples or newborns at household parties. They used to earn their living based on the cultural belief that hijras can bless one’s house with prosperity and fertility.”

Yet that has changed over time, and “hijras have lost their admired space in society… outside the group, they are discriminated against and scorned almost everywhere. Now they make a living by walking around the streets collecting money from shopkeepers, bus and train passengers or by prostitution.”



I made this video in 2000, by this time I had full become "Fem-male", or the say I knew my role was -passive/receptive Feminine-.and by this time I was routinely being "Boned" bred by men.

excerpt from link above

    

Scientific evidence has been growing that somehow certain brain-structures in the hypothalamus

It appears that if those brain and CNS structures are masculinized in early pregnancy by hormones in the fetus, then the child will have male percepts and a male gender identity, independent of whether the genes or genitalia are male. If those structures are not masculinized in early pregnancy, the child will have a female percepts and a female gender identity, again independent of the genes or genitalia. As in the case of intersex infants having ambiguous genitalia, there are undoubtedly many degrees of cross-gendering of brain and CNS structures, so that while some infants are completely cross-gendered others are only partially cross-gendered. 

More recent research indicates that the brain begins to differentiate in embryonic males and females even earlier, possibly before embryonic sex hormones come into play, and under mechanisms still not yet understood – with gender identity then becoming a complex effect of the interaction between earlier brain differentiation and later embryonic hormones. For more on this emerging research, see: “Brain development: The most important sexual organ”&nbsp;, in Nature magazine, January 29, 2004&nbsp; (<i>Nature</i>&nbsp;<b>427</b>, 390 – 392)

Transgendering, Migrating and Love of Oneself as a Woman: A Contribution to a Sociology of Autogynephilia1     link

By Richard Ekins, Dave King


Citation: Ekins R., King D. (2001) Transgendering, Migrating and Love of Oneself as a Woman: A Contribution to a Sociology of Autogynephilia. IJT 5,3, http://www.symposion.com/ijt/ijtvo05no03_01.htm

This paper considers Ray Blanchard’s taxonomic, typological and diagnostic approach to his concept of ‘autogynephilia’ (‘love of oneself as a woman’) in male-to-female transsexuals, in the context of Anne Lawrence’s appropriation of the concept in the service of her personal transgendering identity formation and transgendering identity politics. A striking contemporary example of the umbilical cord that exists between the formulations of science and those of sections of the transgendered community is provided by the interrelations between Blanchard’s and Lawrence’s work on autogynephilia. The concept of autogynephilia is considered from the standpoint of the sociology of transgendering put forward in Ekins (1997) and Ekins and King (1999, 2001a, 2001b). In particular, the interrelations between transgendering, ‘migrating’ and the role of autogynephilia are examined with reference to selected material from life history work with three male-to-female transsexual informants. While it is not difficult to find autogynephilic components in transgendering trajectories, the interesting questions relate to the status of those components over diverse trajectories, including the constituting and consolidating (Ekins, 1993, 1997) of autogynephilic identities. The sociological approach presented in this paper provides the conceptual wherewithal to unpack a number of controversial issues surrounding the concept of autogynephilia and its reception.

: transgendering, transsexual, autogynephilia, erotic femaling, identity.

The purpose of this paper is to set the stage for a dialogue about the role of the erotic (sexuality) within the ‘migrating’ mode of transgendering (Ekins and King, 1999, 2001a, 2001b). In particular, we raise a topic which is currently hotly debated within some sections of the transgender community, namely that of ‘autogynephilia’.2

We first introduce our particular focus by saying something about each of the three concepts in the title of the paper – transgendering, migrating and autogynephilia. We then elaborate upon the sociological approach we are developing in our theoretical and empirical work on transgendering, in order to provide a conceptual framework to explore the fullest possible range of transgender diversity. Thirdly, we illustrate our approach with reference to selected material drawn from life history work with three informants, in order to provide relevant examples of the role of autogynephilia in actual transgender lives, to which we might all relate our own experience. A discussion section is followed by a brief conclusion.
 

In recent years, it has become orthodox within the transgender community to use the term ‘transgender’ as a broad and inclusive term. A particularly apt definition is that of Thom and More (1998:3) who use the term ‘transgender’ to describe "the community of all self identified cross gender people whether intersex, transsexual men and women, cross dressers, drag kings and drag queens, transgenderists, androgynous, bi-gendered, third gendered or as yet unnamed gender gifted people". Similarly, in a scholarly context, when the electronic The International Journal of Transgenderism was established in 1997, its name was chosen to reflect its standpoint as "more neutral on etiology", to encompass "the vast complexity of gender manifestations and identities", and "to stimulate new ways of thinking and understanding various aspects of transgenderism" (Pfaefflin and Coleman, 1997). We are happy enough to follow these broad usages of the term, but we prefer to place the initial focus on the gerund of transgender, namely ‘transgendering’. This is to highlight (1) that transgendering is a generic social process; (2) that manifestations of the dimensions and properties of this generic social process will depend on the very different relations that different modes of transgendering have to the male/female binary divide which, from the sociological point of view, constitutes the principal social structural determinant within which the various social processes of transgendering are played out; and (3) that the various and changing categorisations of transgender phenomena and transgender identities are emergents within ongoing social processes of transgendering.

Depending on their relationship to the binary male/female divide, transgendering processes are classifiable into four major modes or styles. These we term, respectively, ‘migrating’, ‘oscillating’, ‘negating’, and ‘transcending’ (Ekins and King, 2001a).3 Migrating involves moving from one side of the binary divide to the other on a permanent basis. Oscillating involves moving to and fro between male and female polarities, across and between the divide, as in the case with the part-time cross-dresser. Negating indicates those processes tending towards eliminating the binary divide – a move to the ungendered: the ‘gender-less’ (Ekins and King, 2001a). Finally, transcending presupposes going beyond the binary divide – a move to the ‘gender-full’, as is graphically illustrated in the following statement from an internet mailing list called ‘Sphere’ which states:

"We take our name from the idea that gender isn’t a dichotomy (where there’s either male or female) or a continuum (where there’s a rainbow of stuff in between, all in a line and all related to male or female) but a sphere, where male and female are just two of an infinite number of possible points and you can be anywhere on, inside, or outside the gendered world."

(Sphere, )

In this paper, we restrict our comments to ‘migrating’ which, to repeat, involves moving from one side of the binary divide to the other on a permanent basis. Migrating presupposes the male/female binary divide – with those migrating, in large measure, accepting that divide, and seeking movement from one side of the divide to the other and acceptance and legitimacy in their new place of abode.

The term ‘autogynephilia’ (‘love of oneself as a woman’) may well be unknown to many. It was orginally introduced into the transgendering literature by Ray Blanchard (1989a), a clinical psychologist, presently Head of the Clinical Sexology Programme of the Clarke Institute of Psychiatry, Toronto, Canada. Blanchard (1989b: 616) defines autogynephilia as "a male’s propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female".4 The concept came to have a great importance to Blanchard in his attempts to refine diagnostic categories of ‘gender disorder’ and implement management strategies for his adult male gender patients (e.g., Blanchard, 1985a, 1985b, 1988, 1989a, 1989b, 1991, 1992, 1993a, 1993b). Just as Hirschfeld ([1910] 1991) had classified his ‘transvestites’ according to their erotic interest, so Blanchard did likewise with ‘transsexuals’. His empirical research convinced him that bisexual, asexual, and heterosexual transsexuals were similar to each other, and dissimilar to homosexual transsexuals, with regard to, inter alia, degree of recalled childhood femininity, extent of interpersonal heterosexual experience, a history of transvestic fetishism, and a history of erotic arousal in association with the thought of being a woman. Such findings led him to the view that there are only two fundamentally different types of transsexualism in males: homosexual and nonhomosexual, and, moreover, that the common characteristic of the nonhomosexual category is their tendency to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of themselves as women – an erotic orientation that he labeled autogynephilia.5
 

Our empirical sociological work with cross-dressers and sex-changers over many years (e.g., Ekins, 1983, 1997; King, 1981, 1993), suggests to us that all transgendered identities – whether older and medicalised ones such as ‘transsexual’ and ‘transvestite’, or newer transgender activist ones such as ‘gender transient’ and ‘gender outlaw’ – are emergents within three sets of interrelations. These interrelations are those between (1) sex (the body), sexuality (erotic and sensuous response) and gender (the social and cultural correlates of the division between the sexes);6 (2) ‘scientific’, sub-cultural and lay conceptualisations and theorisations – what we refer to as ‘scientific’, ‘member’ and ‘lay’ knowledge of transgendering phenomena; and (3) self, identity and social worlds (Ekins, 1997).

Up until the 16th Biennial Harry Benjamin Conference of 1999, we had not given much thought to Blanchard’s concept of autogynephilia. For us, Blanchard’s work was yet another example of that tradition within the medical model and positivist science which seemed overly preoccupied with classification, in the service of diagnosis, etiological theorising and the management of ‘disorders’. Blanchard’s re-emphasis upon sexuality was important, but as one of us (Ekins) was already exploring the role of sexuality in transgendering using the concept of ‘erotic femaling’ and exploring its interrelations with ‘body femaling’ and ‘gender femaling’ (Ekins, 1993, 1997), we felt no pressing need to explore Blanchard’s work in detail.7

Two papers by Anne Lawrence (Lawrence, 1999a, 1999b) presented at the 16th Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Conference in London, however, led us to rethink this view. Indeed, we found Lawrence's papers to be amongst the highlights of the conference. Anne Lawrence identifies as a post-operative transsexual woman, and for some years has been popularising Blanchard's concept (Lawrence, 1998, 1999c, 1999d, 1999e, 2000). In brief, she identifies with the concept, describes herself as an 'autogynephilic transsexual', conceptualises autogynephilic feelings as one of her principal motivations for seeking re-assignment surgery, maintains her autogynephilic identity post-operatively, and presents papers giving impressive evidence that she is not alone, but rather, is part of a sizeable number of the transgender community (Lawrence, 1999c, 1999d).

It would not be exaggerating to say that Anne Lawrence and her work have created something of a storm within sections of the transgender community. There is no doubt that some (male-to-female) transsexual women find Lawrence’s work courageous and affirming. They feel it validates their own experiences and commend her for bringing the erotic out of the transsexual closet. However, her many critics are considerably more vocal. The force of their criticisms and the personal nature of many of their verbal assaults left Lawrence "feeling defensive, perplexed, and deeply troubled" (Lawrence, 2000). The criticisms are wide-ranging. She is variously accused of being self-serving, confused, misguided, a source of personal distress to many transgendered people, and a political disaster. The contrast between her impressive candour and grasp of her subject, and the invective that her life and work provokes, both intrigues us and commands our interest and respect. So much so, that on returning from the Harry Benjamin conference, one of us (Ekins) was led to explore her website,8 read her work and study its reception. We also studied the relevant papers by Blanchard. It soon emerged from her papers, that Lawrence, after periods of personal confusion, ‘found herself’ with reference to Blanchard’s concept, in much the same way that so many transgendered people speak of ‘finding themselves’ when first becoming acquainted and adopting the medical terms ‘transvestite’ or ‘transsexual’. Here was a striking late 20th century example of the umbilical cord existing between ‘member’ and ‘scientific’ (‘expert’) conceptualisations of transgendering phenomena, which entailed the constituting and consolidating (Ekins, 1993, 1997) of an emergent transgender identity right before our eyes, so to speak.
 

9

In the main, it is uncontroversial to consider ‘transvestism’ in terms of its erotic (autogynephilic) components; to do likewise with ‘transsexualism’ is controversial. At this point, we won’t speculate further on Blanchard’s particular use of the term,10 or, indeed, elaborate upon its hostile reception within sections of the transgender community, though we would be very interested to receive feedback on these matters (). Rather, we will consider, briefly, the role of sexuality in three selected transgendering trajectories, to provide some background material to relate to in order to set the stage for dialogue about the role of autogynephilia in transgendering trajectories. All three informants identify as ‘transsexuals’. All three are post-operative and ‘pass’ in most settings as ‘genetic women’. All three came to identify as transsexual and began their ‘migrating’ in their late 30s - early 40s. However, each informant provides very different ‘vocabularies of motive’ (Mills, 1940; Ekins, 1983) for their migrating. ‘Rachael’ places the emphasis upon her envy of female bodies and a distaste and revulsion of her male body – her migrating might be seen as, principally, ‘body-led’. ‘Gail’ reports an autogynephilic phase on the way to re-assignment. In different phases of her migrating trajectory the autogynephilic component varied. ‘Janice’ also describes her transition as being ‘body-led’, but she specifically identifies as autogynephilic, both pre- and post-operatively. We will outline their respective migrating trajectories with particular reference to the role of autogynephilia.

Prior to preparing this paper, Ekins had been carrying out life-history work with Rachael for 15 years and with Gail for 6 years. Throughout this work, Rachael never spoke of being sexually aroused by the thought of herself as female, a girl or as a woman. Gail spoke of her ‘erotic femaling’ as being limited to a particular phase of her male femaling trajectory (Ekins, 1997: 146-154). Rachael and Gail were selected to provide examples of very different life-history material relating to the autogynephilic, in order to compare their trajectories with the self-identified ‘autogynephilic transsexual’, Janice. Janice has been an informant for some eighteen months; we were introduced to her after we began to consider Blanchard’s concept seriously. In preparing this paper, Ekins then re-interviewed Rachael and Gail, after introducing them to Blanchard’s concept. A series of open-ended questions were designed to elicit responses from them about their ‘autogynephilic’ responses over the course of their transgendering trajectories.

Rachael

Rachael’s earliest recollections of what she now refers to as ‘transsexual’ feelings occurred when she was six or seven years old. She was playing with a girl playmate, who lived next door to her and she remembers feeling she wanted her body to be like her playmate’s. The playmate’s clothes were of no particular interest to Rachael: both the children played in similar clothes – sandals and shorts. Rachael has no recollection of any erotic element to the wish. She simply wanted her playmate’s body, instead of her own. Her first sexual encounter was when she was the victim of homosexual abuse when nine years old. This left her confused and frightened. During adolescence she had a number of homosexual encounters, all of which she found unsatisfactory because, as she put it: "I wanted to be making love to a man, but I wanted to be a woman making love to a man". During this period, she had "indecisive sorts of relationships" with a couple of older women. At no time during this period does she recall being sexually aroused by the thought or image of herself as a female. Rather, desperately wanting the physical body of a woman and being unable to face up to doing anything about it, she took flight into large quantities of drugs. When 19 years old, she married her first wife intending to embark on a heterosexual relationship as a man. Sexual relations were only possible when Rachael fantasised that she had her wife’s body. The marriage fell apart when Rachael was 30 and she consulted a psychiatrist about her ‘transsexual’ feelings. She felt unable to proceed with re-assignment procedure although, for a while, did take oestrogen. Later, she married, again, with similar feelings and consequences to her first marriage. On occasions Rachael would masturbate, but says she did not think about herself as a woman when she masturbated. Rather, as she puts it: "I thought of a man making love to me as a woman". She felt that to be ‘transsexual’, her psychiatrists expected her to naturally take the woman’s role, to wear make-up, and so on. Because she felt no pressing need to do these things, she doubted her commitment to re-assignment; indeed, could not accept that she was transsexual.11 Rachael was a lorry driver by profession. Her ‘Damascus Road’ experience came when she was sitting in her lorry as a man, and had the flash of insight that this is what she wanted – to be a woman doing this; to be a woman lorry driver. Henceforth, she pursued re-assignment surgery. Throughout, her priority was to "remove any and every physical manifestation of maleness within my body". Post-operatively, Rachael came to have sexual relations with men, feeling that she thinks, "like any other woman . . . I talk things over with women friends. There are difficulties having a relationship with a man . . . but it just seems the right thing to do".

Gail

Gail’s first recollections relating to her later ‘transsexual’ identity are clearly autogynephilic. They began when she started masturbating in her early teens. She used to cut pictures of girls she found attractive out of magazines and "masturbate to them", imagining that she was the girl in the picture. In particular, ‘hair’ was the big turn on at the start: "long, wavy, shiny and very feminine hair gained my attention. The face and body next". She was shy with girls but did have one steady girlfriend she was dating at the time of her 17th birthday: "I certainly didn’t have intercourse or anything like that. I was still relatively shy". She continues: "And then, on my 17th birthday, completely out of the blue . . . I went downstairs . . . and to this day, I’ll never know why, I put on some of my mother’s mascara and eye-shadow and lipstick". There followed an episodic pattern of making-up and curling her hair and dressing in her mother’s clothes. She was, she speculates "becoming the woman that I used to masturbate to in the pictures". Over the years, however, the sexual kick of her cross-dressing reduced and gave way to a feeling of inner peace and tranquillity. Meanwhile, the total confusion of not knowing who or what she was, in doing these ‘strange’ things, led her to the library and the discovery of ‘transvestites’ and ‘transsexuals’. In due time she approached the Beaumont Society, met self-identified ‘transvestites’ and ‘transsexuals’, began to identify with the latter, and approached a psychiatrist about the possibility of her being transsexual. The psychiatrist put her on a course of oestrogen, the premise being, Gail reports, that when her sexual desire dropped – which it did fairly quickly – if she was getting a sexual kick from cross-dressing and wasn’t transsexual, she would be horrified at the loss of her masculinity. In the event, she soon became unable to sustain an erection, went on to anti-androgen hormones, started electrolysis, and from this time onwards "knew that (she) was transsexual". A divorce followed. Whilst pre-operative, she had her first sexual relationship with a man. It was a revelation to her. For the first time she realised that this was where her sexual orientation was. She felt "totally happy as a woman, with a man". She enjoyed fellatio, whereas cunnilingus had disgusted her. Once post-operative, she soon met her present male partner, with whom she has been living for a number of years. She does not report autogynephilic arousal, rather the sexual pleasure of giving and receiving in a heterosexual sexual relationship.

Janice

Janice was six years old when she first recalls actively fantasising about wearing girls’ clothes and having visible breasts beneath her sweaters. The fantasies produced "a pleasant state of excitement", which she later came to conceptualise as erotic. At eight years old, Janice was dressing in her mother’s clothes whenever she had the privacy to do so. Although she became sexually aroused with cross-dressing, she hated her erect penis, which reminded her of her maleness. Her fantasies quickly became more body-focused. By the time she was 14, she was fantasising primarily about having a female body – having breasts, long hair, no penis, a vagina, and a hairless face. She affected an androgynous appearance and continued to cross-dress in private. These activities, like her fantasies, were highly erotic to Janice, which distressed her not only because this reminded her of her maleness, but because it seemed to preclude her (she thought) from being ‘really’ transsexual.

In her early twenties, Janice started experimenting with black market oestrogens. After taking oestrogen for a number of weeks her sex drive would disappear and with it most of her desire for a woman’s body. The desire would return when she stopped taking the oestrogen. Eventually she found a dosage of oestrogen that she wanted to take continuously but, after a few years, stopped, concluding that she did not have the courage to transition. Instead, she focused on developing a career, later marrying and having a family. Sexual relations with her wife were accompanied and enabled by her fantasising her body as female. Shortly after the birth of her children, she began taking oestrogen again, and during this period first encountered Blanchard’s concept of autogynephilia. It was her ‘Road to Damascus’ experience. Her immediate reaction was "This is me!" A year later, at the age of 39, she began living full-time as a woman and, aged 41, she underwent sex-reassignment surgery. She remains as sexually excited by her actual migrating as she was by her fantasying it: "Nowadays my most common masturbatory fantasies usually involve little more than the sequential mental consideration of all the physical feminisation I’ve undergone. It’s like going through a list: now I have breasts; now I have a vagina; now I have hair to my shoulders; now I have pierced ears, etc. Just the contemplation of all these physical changes is enough to get me reliably excited."
 

Rachael is insistent that she has never masturbated to the thought of herself as a woman. This might seem prima facie evidence that she has no autogynephilic response. However, she does speak of masturbating to the thought of herself having intercourse as a woman with a man. Blanchard would, presumably, see this as an example of what he calls an "autogynephilic interpersonal fantasy" (Blanchard, 1989b). Anne Lawrence (A. Lawrence, personal communication, 2000) suggests that perhaps Rachael is primarily aroused by her feminised self, reflected not in a mirror, but in another (male) person. She remarks: "I doubt that Rachael is truly aroused by men or by men’s bodies".12 Much the same might be said of the later phases of Gail’s trajectory. But again, much the same might be said of many prima facie ‘heterosexual’ genetic women.

This debate raises important issues concerning, inter alia, the relations of autogynephilic fantasies in the transgendered with what one informant referred to as "the basic ingredients of heterosexuality". Many of Blanchard’s and Lawrence’s transgendered critics argue that the autogynephilic fantasies they describe are no different from the fantasies of heterosexual genetic women. When this move is made, Blanchard’s concept of autogynephilia as a male’s love of himself as a woman is extended to a female’s love of herself as a woman. There is no doubt, for instance, that many genetic women find erotic the thought of themselves as desirable and/or desired women. Relatedly, those who research ‘heterosexual’ spectator response to ‘heterosexual’ pornographic film claim that the male spectator typically desires the females claimed by the (desiring) male protagonist, whilst the female spectator fantasises about being the desirable and/or desired woman – the ‘love of oneself as a woman’ that this fantasising may trigger may make the desiring person variously irrelevant. Put another way, the degree of narcissism in episodes of desire varies. From this standpoint the ‘love of oneself as a woman’ experienced by genetic women and male-to-female women might seem indistinguishable.

One transgendered male-to-female informant described how she would dress herself up as a provocative woman, attract the desire of a ‘straight’ man at a ‘straight’ disco, and on returning home, on her own, position a mirror in front of herself angled to reflect the image the man would have had of her when he found her sexually desirable. She would then masturbate to that image – of herself through the imagined eyes of the male admirer.13 It is evident that ‘actual’ others (and parts of others), memories of actual others, fantasy others, actual and fantasy interactions, actual and fantasy scripts, actual and fantasy props, and so on, may be variously implicated in erotic episodes, variously scripted and enacted. Others and props (both actual and fantasy) may be variously essential, optional, or irrelevant in particular episodes of arousal, arousal maintenance, and orgasm.

However, it is important to remember that on our sociological, processual and relational understanding of these issues, meanings of narratives and their constituents emerge within the frameworks they are placed. For the purposes of this preparatory paper, from the standpoint of autogynephilia, we have been content to structure our discussion around just one mode of transgendering (migrating) and three short narratives. Elsewhere, however, we have distinguished five major sub-processes as being variously implicated within each mode or style of transgendering (Ekins and King, 2001a). These are the sub-processeses of ‘erasing’ (eliminating aspects of sex, sexuality, gender), ‘substituting’ (replacing aspects of sex, sexuality and gender with their ‘opposite’), ‘concealing’ (concealing aspects of sex, sexuality and gender that are seen to conflict with the intended gender display), ‘implying’ (implying ‘opposite’ aspects of sex, sexuality and gender), and ‘redefining’ (redefining components within the binary gender divide and/or redefining the divide itself).14  Within the migrating mode of transgendering, the sub-processes of erasing, concealing, implying, and redefining are variously co-opted and implicated in the service of the sub-process of substituting.

Once autogynephilia is considered in the light of the sub-processes and their interrelations, it becomes possible, inter alia, to detail the ways in which autogynephilic response in migrating differs from autogynephilic response in those not migrating, i.e., in the other modes of transgendering and in genetic women. Many of our migrating informants, for instance, tell us of their erotic arousal to the thought of actual and fantasied erasing and substituting. The eroticising of the respective sub-processes, the degree of the respective eroticising, and the interrelations between the various erotisations will vary between individuals and within individual trajectories. This is an exceedingly complex business. In our judgement, our framework provides the conceptual wherewithal to unpack such issues in a way denied to the taxonomic, typological and diagnostic approach followed by Blanchard.
 

As Ekins has argued elsewhere – in his conceptualisation of ‘erotic femaling’ (Ekins, 1993, 1997) – it is not difficult to find autogynephilic components in the transgendering trajectories of informants who, in Blanchard’s terms, are ‘nonhomosexual transsexuals’ – or, for that matter, in the trajectories of those he would term ‘homosexual transsexuals’. Rather, the interesting questions relate to the status of these components. As qualitative sociologists, what interests us is the nature and extent of the autogynephilic component and its interrelations with other components of transgendering over diverse trajectories, including the constituting and consolidating of full-blown autogynephilic identities.

We might also note that the recent furore concerning Blanchard’s work provides rich material for studies in the management of sexual stigma, the sociology of secrecy, and related issues. It would also make an excellent case study in the interrelations between transgender politics, clinical psychology and the social construction of reality. Meanwhile, we present our paper as a modest start in the direction of a sociology of autogynephilia.
 

We wish to thank Anne Lawrence, Wendy Saunderson, Ray Blanchard, and two anonymous reviewers for their assistance in the preparation of this paper. Special appreciation goes to Rachael, Gail Hill and Janice Epstein. The quotations from trans-theory discussants A.J. Annala, Nicole Storme and Suzan Cooke are reproduced with thanks and with permission.
 

Footnotes
  1. of this paper, "Transgendering, migrating and the role of autogynephilia", was presented at the 6th International Gender Dysphoria Conference, Hume Hall, University of Manchester, UK, 1-3 September 2000.
  2. , for example, the archives of the trans-theory list (). Our preparation of this paper was punctuated by yet more irate comments about autogynephilia and the concept’s originator, Ray Blanchard, sent to us as trans-theory list subscribers. On 14 August 2000, A.J. Annala renewed the debate with a brief comment: "What do you think of Blanchard’s notions about autogynephilia? It seems to me this theory is about as dismissive of large numbers of transsexuals as is the categorization of primary vs secondary transsexuals". Within minutes, the debate was re-activated, yet again. Nicole Storme, in measured tone, was prepared to grant the concept a certain legitimacy: "I think enough transwomen have said that it describes their experience that I’ll grant it a certain legitimacy". However, she adds: "I think Blanchard’s ‘autogynephilia’ has become a deus ex machina, a sort of catch-all category to explain away anyone who didn’t transition by the time they were in their early 20s, or otherwise doesn’t fit the classic AP (or ‘homosexual’) model for transwomen . . . What I object to is the binary they’ve come to represent: That you’re either one or the other. I’m pretty convinced that transsexuals as a group are a lot more complicated than that." Suzan Cooke, on the other hand, would have none of this: "I vehemently object to this stupid theory in that it thinks that my liking men was in any way shape or form homosexuality . . . I actually had sex with 3 or 4 homosexuals. They said fucking me was having sex with a girl. I trust their evaluation more than some stupid bigot like Blanchard. I stopped having sex with homosexuals after that and started having sex with heterosexual men. Blanchard’s calling them homosexual is weird trans/homo phobia. HE REALLY HAS A PROBLEM AND SHOULD GO INTO THERAPY."
  3. less dense theorisations, we identified the four core processes as ‘migrating’, ‘oscillating’, ‘erasing’, and ‘transcending’. See, Ekins and King (1999: 591-595, 600 and 2001b).
  4. ‘’ has not appeared in the published literature to our knowledge. The term would refer to sexual arousal to the thought or image of oneself as male or masculine, on the part of a female. According to Anne Lawrence (personal communication, 2001), the term has been used and discussed at length privately, and in on-line forums such as SEXNET. Lawrence writes: "I've heard one or two FtMs (female-to-males) talk about it, but have not seen or heard detailed fantasy descriptions. I also do not know if there is a corresponding body of autoandrophilic erotica."
  5. follows Blanchard (2000).
  6. sociological view that aspects of sex, sexuality and gender (not just gender), including the binary divide, all have socially constructed components. On other occasions, we have reserved the term ‘Gender’ with a capital ‘G’ for this latter sense, keeping ‘gender’ with a small ‘g’ to refer to the distinction between sex, sexuality and gender. For the purposes of this paper, however, we find it too cumbersome to adopt this device. It should be clear from the context which sense(s) of G/gender is (are) relevant. Kessler and McKenna (1978) is the seminal text on matters pertaining to these issues. See also Kessler (1998).
  7. (1989b) recognises, of course, that many observers have alluded to the ‘same’ phenomena. His contribution has been to elaborate the observations within the perspective of contemporary clinical psychology.
  8. Women’s Resources,
  9. life-history material, some biographical details have been altered to protect the identities of the informants.
  10. necessary to point out that Blanchard’s concept is primarily descriptive and diagnostic. Bailey (2000) places Blanchard’s work on autogynephilia within the diagnostic tradition of ‘lumping’, which occurs "when two or more apparently different conditions are found to be different forms of the same, underlying pathology". Blanchard sees the term as "primarily descriptive" (R. Blanchard, personal communication, 2000). Many commentators attribute to Blanchard an explanatory intent greater than he, himself, claims. In the main, Blanchard’s less disciplined critics tend to conflate a number of rather different criticisms: the pathologising and heteronormative trends in clinical psychology; the explanatory trends in Blanchard’s work; the political (and, in some instances, personal) unacceptability of his ‘findings’; and the ‘lumping’, indeed reductionist, trends, in his work on autogynephilia. To a sociologist these things matter because, as W.I.Thomas never tired of pointing out: "if men (sic) define situations as real they are real in their consequences" (Thomas, 1923: 14).
  11. considers that her medical consultants were offering her "a transvestite solution to a transsexual problem" and thereby prolonged her distress.
  12. reviewer of an earlier draft of this paper took exception to the tone of "strange in-crowd narcissism" created by our citing our personal communications with Blanchard and Lawrence. Relatedly, a reviewer of Ekins (1997) took issue with its "implicit valorization of expert over member knowledges" (Norton: 1998: 23). We stress that, in our sociological view, the ‘realities’ of transgendering are emergents within the interrelations between ‘lay’ (‘common sense’), ‘member’ and ‘scientific’ (‘expert’) knowledge (Ekins, 1997). What ‘autogynephilia’ means to Blanchard and Lawrence is a significant and researchable component within these interrelations. Lawrence, as a self-identified autogynephilic transsexual, an M.D., a clinical sexologist, and a transgender activist, provides an exemplar of the fact that particular individuals may, of course, be the site of particularly complex interrelations between the various ‘knowledges’. As empirical social scientists, we situate our theory, methodology and research techniques within the interactionist view of science put forward by George Herbert Mead (Strauss, 1964) and Herbert Blumer (1969), and the sociological view of motivation put forward by C. Wright Mills (1940). For more recent statements within this interactionist tradition, see Strauss (1993) and Prus (1997). Although Barney Glaser does not share the same ontology and epistemology, his contribution to our approach is seminal (Glaser, 1978).
  13. of a similar dynamic in ‘transvestite’ pornography, see Saxon (n.d., c. 1980: 121): "holding a mirror to his face, he masturbated to a shattering climax as he saw the image of himself as he imagined Arthur saw him when he came the previous night . . ."
  14. this formulation to the less dense formulation presented earlier in Ekins and King (1999, 2001b).
     

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Correspondence to Richard Ekins () or Dave King ()


excerpt from " Transgender Theory:Embodying Research andPractice " ; Transgender theory is an emerging theoretical orientation on the nature of gender and gender identity in understanding the lived experiences of transgender and transsexual individuals. 

This is a confusing use of terms indeed, I personally though have not had any surgery, may never, see myself as a form of transsexual, which falls under the base term Transgender or Third-gender. Due to fact that if I was able to find a doctor whom could perform at the surgery to remove my penis then construct a vulvoplasty (zero-depth vagina)on myself, and to my liking. then could I afford it. am I healthy enough, if so I would do it, yet I would not try to transition to appear as though I am a Lady, thus in my case I wish to show I am Fem-male, with a sexual role of female, 1st for my own identity need, then to confirm to a partner, that I am 100% female sexually roled , and psychologically very feminine, and have no desire to be in male sexual role.

 From my research , I would have to take Testosterone in some form, yet I have no desire to take female enhancing hormones.

I very much Nature created transFeminine people like myself, whom naturally had physically aspects of "Male ", able to hunt,protect the females,children,elders -tribe- while the men hunted ,yet at same time could teach the youth how to hunt, do more male type roles, at same time, willing to perform female roles. (this is very much my nature). Yet when there where no females available, like myself , being very sexually attracted, love sexually pleasuring -some males-, yet very much not  "sissy".

                                                                                              I am simply like,


 8/14/2019

Winkte (also spelled wíŋtke) is the contraction of an old Lakota word, winyanktehca, meaning '[wants] to be like a woman'.

                                                            I have always wished to be " Like " a women,

                                               and I can be in different ways, from dressing style,sexually,even now surgery

                                                                 A Must Watch if truly interested in learning/caring

   I like that Kristen Beck talks of " Two-Spirit type people ", how the native Americans came to socially accept Third-gender type persons, held them as valued part of the group,tribe society.

    They talk of " public shaming " of bullying types, racism, bigotry in a tribe/society to nip disrupting behavior in the                                                                                             " bud."   



     Yet in my opinion, in less the public as at least as a majority can evolve, share in the collective role of " shaming " those whom            display " bullying types, racism, bigotry , society can not evolve peacefully, or in the higher rate needed to avoid              great conflict on large scale.

    I like this pose, in that I am standing " Firm ", and if I meet a male who dis-respected me in any way, I very much let him know it !

Sex at Dawn  wikipedia;

"

The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality is a 2010 book about the evolution of monogamy in humans and human mating systems by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. In opposition to what the authors see as the "standard narrative" of human sexual evolution, they contend that having multiple sexual partners was common and accepted in the environment of evolutionary adaptedness. The authors contend that mobile, self-contained groups of hunter gatherers were the norm for humans before agriculture led to high population density. Before agriculture, according to the authors, sex was relatively promiscuous and paternity was not a concern. This dynamic is similar to the mating system of Bonobos. According to the book, sexual interactions strengthened the bond of trust in the groups. Far from causing jealousy, social equilibrium and reciprocal obligation were strengthened by playful sexual interactions.

The book generated a great deal of publicity in the popular press where it was met with generally positive reviews. A number of scholars from related academic disciplines (such as anthropology, evolutionary psychology, primatology, biology, and sexology) have commented on the book. Most have been critical of the book's methodology and conclusions although some have praised the book. 


The authors believe that much of evolutionary psychology has been conducted with a bias regarding human sexuality. They argue that the public and many researchers are guilty of the "Flintstonization" of hunter-gatherer society, i.e. projecting modern assumptions and beliefs onto earlier societies. Thus the authors believe that there is a false assumption that our species is primarily monogamous and offer evidence to the contrary.[4] They argue, for example, that our sexual dimorphism, testicle size, female copulatory vocalization, appetite for sexual novelty, various cultural practices, and hidden female ovulation, among other factors strongly suggest a non-monogamous, non-polygynous history. The authors argue that mate selection among pre-agricultural humans was not the subject of intragroup competition as sex was neither scarce nor commodified. Rather, sperm competition was a more important paternity factor than sexual selection. This behavior survives among some remaining hunter-forager groups that believe in partible paternity.

The authors argue as a result that conventional wisdom regarding human nature, as well as what they call the standard narrative of evolutionary psychology, is wrong.[4] Their version of the "standard narrative" goes like this: Males and females assess the value of mates from perspectives based upon their differing reproductive agendas/capacities. According to the authors:

"[The male] looks for signs of youth, fertility, health, absence of previous sexual experience, and likelihood of future sexual fidelity. In other words, his assessment is skewed toward finding a fertile, healthy young mate with many childbearing years ahead and no current children to drain his resources. She looks for signs of wealth (or at least prospects of future wealth), social status, physical health, and likelihood that he will stick around to protect and provide for their children. Her guy must be willing and able to provide materially for her (especially during pregnancy and breastfeeding) and their children (known as male parental investment)."


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excerpt from ↑; 

  What indication is there that homosexuality is indeed natural in human beings?



  • If we review the history of human sexuality we see that throughout recorded history in diverse cultures spread across the globe whenever homosexual behavior has been embraced and permitted, it has been so widespread and dominant that every such culture found it necessary to condemn exclusive homosexuality in order to ensure that a sufficient level of heterosexual activity existed to enable its survival. If heterosexuality was indeed an innate, largely universal characteristic of human beings, this historical regulation of homosexuality and enforcement of heterosexuality would not have been necessary.

9. Heterosexuals vastly outnumber homosexuals in the world because societies - needing to maintain their
    populations - universally encourage heterosexuality while discouraging, or forbidding, homosexuality.









1. We are unique in the animal world in not possessing a sexual instinct that would compel us to engage
    in heterosexual intercourse.

            What indications are there that this is true?



  • Humans are the only animal species that can choose not to have offspring. All other sexually reproducing animals are compelled to engage in heterosexual intercourse and reproduce when they sense the right combination of seasonal, pheromonal, and/or visual cues. This proves that humans do not rely on environmental cues, neither pheromonal nor visual, to dictate their sexual behavior.

  • Humans are the only species where exclusive homosexual subgroups exist. In all other animal species where homosexual activity is seen, the same individuals invariably also engage in heterosexual intercourse because their sexual behavior is underpinned by a reproductive instinct.
2. It was the tremendous rise in intelligence in the course of human evolution that made the loss of our
    sexual instinct possible.

            Why was a sufficiently high intelligence level necessary?



  • For our species to continue surviving, the human line could not lose its sexual instinct until it was possible for reproduction to be relatively assured without it. And this was only possible after humans had first found a benefit in producing offspring (realizing that children could provide care and protection in old age), and then discovered what caused reproduction (linking heterosexual intercourse to it). The tremendous insight required for both discoveries was only made possible by a sufficiently high intelligence level.
3. Humans discovered the role of heterosexual intercourse in reproduction not by scrutinizing their own sexual
    behavior, but by making that correlation on another species first. The reason this was necessary is that instincts
    are not tied to memory, and hence the operation of a sexual instinct would leave no memory trace with which to link
    any ensuing pregnancy. Crucially then, the domestication of dogs may have provided the first opportunity to closely
    observe the sexual behavior of another animal species, and eventually make the breakthrough correlation.
    (See Link Between Dog Domestication, Human Intelligence, And Neanderthal Extinction

4. Once the mystery of reproduction had been solved, the road was paved for a short-lived nasal plug during fetal
    development to eliminate the sexual instinct in the human line. It did so by isolating the developing vomeronasal
    organ (VN0)- critical for pheromone detection and response - from chemical 'set-up' signals that would have likely
    emanated from the concurrently differentiating sex organs, thus inhibiting the VNO's proper development and
    functionality. This developmental change appeared within the last 200,0000 years. Of all hominin species that ever
    existed, only homo sapiens gained knowledge of the essential role of heterosexual intercourse in reproduction.
    Hence, all other hominin species necessarily continued to possess a sexual instinct (viz. a functional VNO),
    irrespective of their brain size. (For a more in-depth explanation read a blog entry on the fetal nasal plug.)

5. The loss of the sexual instinct conferred upon homo sapiens a vastly increased intelligence level, and allowed them
    to outthink, out innovate, and out compete the Neanderthals into extinction.

The Basket or Bow:

Bernard Cache briefly mentions the determination of sexual identity in the Guaranis tribe. About this initiation rite, Cache says, “the adolescent must choose an object: a bow for men, a basket for women. A bow and basket are thus the figures of Guaranis sexual identity.

Upon further research of the basket or the bow initiation rite, I came across an article entitled, “The Berdache Tradition” by Walter L. Williams. A berdache, or “two-spirit” is defined as an alternative gender role that was believed to house both a masculine or female spirit. One way to identify a berdache member was if during the initiation rite, a man chose a basket or a woman chose a bow. The berdache tradition has been “documented in over 130 tribes, in every region of North America, among every type of native culture.” A two-spirit often took the role of a medicine man and was a mediator between men, women, and the physical and spiritual worlds. Berdache could have relationships with members of either sex and their clothing and social roles were a representation of both genders (wikipedia).

Thus I identify very closely; as " berdache "

    Though I identify as homosexual, I identify as Transsexual in a ideal form,in that I truly have              wanted to have breasts and vagina like a female, and have sex with men, due to myself                    having a female type psychologically need to be " bred " as a female

I often have wondered why I had such a seemly innate desire to Fellate prior to puberty-(suck another males penis).I know by at least age 8 I sucked other males penis's (friends), at puberty (first ejaculations) upon finding out I was able to easily auto-fellate .

Autofellatio is the act of oral stimulation of one's own penis as a form of masturbation. Only a limited number of men are physically capable of performing autofellatio.[1]


Thus Once I began to suck my own penis,then ejaculate in my mouth and swallow, this I began to do daily if possible.

 This is a topic that there seems to be very little knowledge on, such as are, most who have, prone to be homosexual ?


Thus was I primed and ready;   When a male, 14 of age , enticed me to suck his, I eagerly did, it was very right, seemed natural, this became routine, then once he offered to penetrate me anally, then after he ejaculated up in me, seemed very natural and right,, I have often thought of " does having semen in a person have a biological effect ? "

excerpt from ↑;

The assumption often runs that anyone who, historically or in the modern era, thinks about or tries to fellate himself likely did so out of homoerotic urges. For some people throughout history, this has likely been the motive. Al Eingang, a contortionist known as “the King of the Self-Suck” since he started performing auto-fellatio in adult films in the 1980s, tells me that he got started in puberty in part because “I already knew I wanted to suck cock, and mine was right there, waiting to be sucked.” Social pressures against homosexual acts could, writer Jesse Bering argued in Slate eight years back, have historically nudged men towards it as a form of isolated, safe sexual exploration.

                                           A very Homosexual tribe 


Etoro, a tribe of 400 people living by hunting and small-scale gardening in eastern New Guinea, on the southern slopes of Mt. Sisa (Stickland-Bosavi district).


This power is transmitted between the members of the tribe by means of sex. That's why young boys, even at the age of 12, get it from the sperm of the older males. The boy gets "power" orally by a young man assigned to be his partner. Few years later, the teenager is formally involved in relationships with many male sex partners, after which he turns into an "inseminator" from an "inseminee."

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Research has shown that the vagina absorbs several biological products contained in seminal fluid (e.g., estrogen, testosterone, prostaglandins) that can be measured in the female’s bloodstream within several hours after administration (Benziger & Edleson, 1983; Sandberg et al., 1968). Our data are consistent with Ney’s suggestion that semen in the female reproductive tract may play a role in modulating depressive symptoms (Ney, 1986). Indeed, our results suggest that semen may act to promote further sexual activity. Of the various components found in semen, the presence of estrogen and estrogen metabolites are obvious candidates for what might be mediating these effects. Both estrogen and prostaglandins have been shown to alleviate depressive symptoms, or at least exist in lower levels in those who are depressed (Abdullah & Hamadah, 1975; Zweifel & O’Brien, 1997). Estrogen has been shown to have mood elevating effects in postmenopausal females (Coope, 1996) and estrogen-based contraceptives have also been reported to elevate mood in younger females (Roy-Byrne, Rubinow, Gold, & Post, 1984). If semen does antagonize depressive symptoms in females, it is interesting to speculate about where this effect may originate; that is, are the effects mediated by the transport of semen components through vaginal tissue or through the uterus? One obvious way to make a preliminary determination about the site of action would be to compare females who are using diaphragms as a means of contraception with those who are neither using diaphragms or condoms. Among those using diaphragms, the effect of semen would be restricted to the vaginal tract. It is also possible that there may be other nonreproductive sitesofentry.Forexample,itwouldbeinterestingtoinvestigate the possible antidepressant effects of oral ingestion of semen, or semen applied through anal intercourse (or both) among both heterosexual couples as well as homosexual males.

 _________________________________________________________________________________     


                                 Straight Men do see homosexual men just for sex



Tristan Taormino at Village Voice conducted a series of interviews; 

      with straight men who have sex with other men, and asked them about their motivations.


        Thirty-five-year-old John was dating several women at the time of the interview, echoed this sentiment, saying, “There are less emotional complications for me. Many men will do things some women will not,   and many men give better oral sex.   I think men will exercise their hunger for sex and not deny that they are horny more so than women. They feel comfortable sexually bonding.” - .mamamia.com.au

                                                                That why they where seeing me

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________

As my Theory, and my research leads very much in the direction of ; about .05 percent of males in a population are pre-disposed to be transgender, in a pure form population ,un-hindered by " Pre-Concieved Notions ". social construct etc.

Low testosterone can be just as devastating for a male infant. Researchers have found evidence that phthalates, a common family of chemicals in plastics that lower testosterone [11] are linked to effeminizing behavior in boys.  (See number 10 in my link on Child IQ for more details.) Animal studies have shown nasty effects from phthalates as well, including permanent reproductive disorders [10] and a recent human study showed lowered sperm counts as verification. [14] In other words, the damage seems to be permanent.


 

Even more frightening is the fact that initial studies show a correlation between phthalate exposure and autism [12] and schizophrenia. [13]

What can you do?  Tell anyone you know who is pregnant to avoid smoking and plastics for starters. Recommended cooking and drinking materials are glass and stainless steel whenever possible, especially around children.


   above                             " Peripheral serum testosterone levels were determined in 180 women during weeks 7 to 20 of pregnancy with a specific radioimmunoassay. After a normal pregnancy and delivery 90 serum samples were randomly selected from mothers of boys and 90 serum samples from mothers of girls. The testosterone concentrations were correlated with the sex of the fetuses. The mean testosterone level +/- S.D. in pregnant women with female fetuses was 597 +/- 167 pg. per milliliter. In pregnant women with male fetuses the testosterone concentrations were on the average significantly higher (p less than 0.01), with a mean value of 828 +/- 298 pg. per milliliter. The course of the testosterone concentrations in women with male fetuses showed an increase beginning in week 7, reaching a maximum during weeks 9 to 11, followed by a decrease until weeks 15 to 20. During weeks 9 to 11 of pregnancy fetal sex determination was possible in 28 per cent of the males and in 5 per cent of the females, with a probability of 95.5 per cent."

excerpt from ↑ ;

Animal studies, from Witt’s lab and others, have shown that oxytocin can have dramatic effects on behavior. When the natural release of oxytocin is blocked, for instance, mothers – from sheep to rats – reject their own young.

Meanwhile, virgin female rats injected with oxytocin fawn over another female’s young, nuzzling the pups and protecting them as if they were their own.

In addition, studies show that oxytocin in females, as well as the closely related vasopressin in males, is key to pair bonding.

“You first meet him and he’s passable,” Witt said of the phenomena. “The second time you go out with him, he’s OK. The third time you go out with him, you have sex. And from that point on you can’t imagine what life would be like without him.”

“What’s behind it?” she added. “It could be oxytocin.”

Since the release of oxytocin can be classically conditioned, after repeatedly having sex with the same partner, just seeing that partner could release more oxytocin, making you want to be with that person all the more, and you bond, she said.

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Obviously, there is much to learn about hormones and sexual desires

excerpt  ;


Jump to search

Sexual motivation is influenced by hormones such as testosterone, estrogen, progesterone, oxytocin, and vasopressin. In most mammalian species, sex hormones control the ability to engage in sexual behaviors. However, sex hormones do not directly regulate the ability to copulate in primates (including humans). Rather, sex hormones in primates are only one influence on the motivation to engage in sexual behaviours. 


Oxytocin and vasopressin

The hormones oxytocin and vasopressin are implicated in regulating both male and female sexual motivation. Oxytocin is released at orgasm and is associated with both sexual pleasure and the formation of emotional bonds.[14] Based on the pleasure model of sexual motivation, the increased sexual reproduction pleasure that occurs following oxytocin release may encourage motivation to engage in future sexual reproduction activities. Emotional closeness can be an especially strong predictor of sexual motivation in females and insufficient oxytocin release may subsequently diminish sexual reproduction arousal and motivation in females.

High levels of vasopressin can lead to decreases in sexual motivation for females.[14] A link between vasopressin release and aggression has been observed in females, which may impair female sexual reproduction arousal and sexual motivation by leading to feelings of neglect and hostility toward a sexual partner.[15] In males, vasopressin is involved in the arousal phase. Vasopressin levels have been shown to increase during erectile response in male sexual reproduction arousal, and decrease back to baseline following ejaculation.[16] The increase of vasopressin during erectile response may be directly associated with increased motivation to engage in sexual behaviour.[14]


One thing I have always wondered about is " Once I am actually with a man, and I have gotten him erect or he is already erect while I am getting his pants un-zipped say, My penis instantly goes limp, yet starts leaking a continuous flow of slick pre-cum, nearly always if I like him a lot, the extreme urge to get him to penetrate me anally and ejaculate up in me, is intense, once he has ejaculated in me, in a certain sense " I am his ", he can now sexual have me anytime he wishs, I always thought was from the semen, yet maybe is;
                                                                             oxytocin and vasopressin

                                     Oxytocin and Social Anxiety

Several studies have indicated that oxytocin may be useful in warding off mental illnesses, including social anxiety. In 2013, a statistical analysis was conducted on healthy and mentally ill individuals. The levels of oxytocin within individuals with anxiety, autism, and schizophrenia were compared to their mental states.


The findings correlated positively with the presence of oxytocin. In people with autism, improved communication and relationship formation was associated with higher amounts of the love drug. Individuals with schizophrenia demonstrated lowered rates of psychosis when their levels of oxytocin were higher. Even those suffering from anxiety disorders reported lessened fear responses when they had higher concentrations of oxytocin.- oxytocin.org

excerpt from  ;

  The authors suggested that semen might be a natural mood-elevator.  After all, it contains chemicals like estrone, oxytocin, cortisol, serotonin and melatonin, stuff that is linked to better mood, increased affection and better ,.


I know after a man has either ejaculated in my mouth or up inside my bottom, I feel really good, and a strong drive to desire more!-me

     I know between 2000-2005 , I was very hooked on " getting the Attention " of men, so they would ejaculate up inside me


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                           A Scenario, based on the " Telegony"  concept

                                                            As a third-gender / female roled male type person,


                                                 And say living in the hostile environment, of say 10,000 years ago, 


                                            on the North American Continent where many bands of people roamed,


                                                         along with large mammals such as bison,wolf,bear etc.


                                                                   A dangerous place to live, and no guns !


                                                Like a wolf pack, these bands had to have a  hierarchies, to survive,


                                        And say I am partner with a female, yet another male comes along,


                       This new male is better hunter,stronger, the female wants him,and the new male wants her,


                                             to survive,  I must adapt, has this " New Union " is going to take place!,


                                                    So my female partner starts mating with the " new male " 


                                                           Yet soon the new male is killed on a hunting trip, 


                                                                    I again can mate with my female partner,


                                                         Yet through " Telegony" she may well carry "Dna traits" ,


                                                              taken into her by way of the " new male's " semen,

                                                                     even though she didn't get pregnant by him.

                     If one can imagine, this is part of my "Thesis" for " Beyond Chiefdom "

                                   1. I don't believe humans have the ability to do well without belonging to a defined , basic chiefdom of aprox.                                            100 individuals

                                   2. This why , Standing back and seeing the north American tribes as these unique yet very much related,is

                                       a great Natural occurance, free from outsiders until 14th century, free from  " Pre-Concieved Notions "                                                  brought by Europeans.

                                   3.  We must submit to understanding, We as mostly  European desent, have created great damage to ;

                                                          Nature, and there is nothing more Powerful, no religion,no ideology!,


                                                      Even now if we rapidly change, great Natural tragedy is going to occur,

                                                                              it's been happening, people just don't get it,

                                                                      It's simply a matter of what aspects left will survive ?.


                                                       There are some great wisdoms in the Bible (not that I am christian )


                                                                        One that has always held my Attention is ;


                                                   "Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth"

                         

The Meek

Psalm 149 reveals that Yahweh “will beautify the meek with salvation”. This is a promise and Jew and Gentile can rejoice in this hope, as the promise is contained in both the Old and New Testaments. In this Psalm the meek shall “praise his name “ and shall “ sing praises unto him”. The concept of praise and honour is established.

                                     So for myself " Yahweh " can only mean " Nature " the very body we are a part of.

Wanting to do what she is doing,seems very instinct to me

I came across this male actor on a web search, he reminds me of a certain friend that would " bone " me, and he was very good at it

, very well hung 9 1/2 " and thick as this man (Danny D )
And if he seems "Right" , I want him in me ejaculating
He loved to mount me like this / very specific like of his